Happy birthday to our 9 year old goob! We are so p Happy birthday to our 9 year old goob! We are so proud of this boy. We are constantly told by others how kind and sweet his is. I mean, we know it too, but it means even more when his character shines through even when mom and dad aren't watching. We love you so much "Puppy!"
More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽ More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽
The start of a new school year has always felt lik The start of a new school year has always felt like more of a “New Years” to me than January 1st ever did. The air starts getting more crisp (thank goodness), the leaves start to change, and the house is quieter (now that the kids are in school, and just during the day, ha). 

Every year around this time I can clearly look back and see how our family has changed. Last year, we had just said goodbye to the boys (our first foster placement) and our family was making sense of the whirlwind that had just happened over the summer. This year, David is way more into soccer, Evy is telling me about the conversations the girls at school are having (she’s a huge people-watcher), and of course Cleo is getting so big! Her first two teeth made their appearance this week and we’re also pretty sure she said “Dada” the other night. 

It really goes by so fast. But little memories like the ones in these photos will last. I remember going apple picking with sweet family friends as a kid and I love doing that for our kids now. 

What traditions have you tried to pass down to your kids?
Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Sinc Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Since she's been a baby, I've been learning that she needs love in a very different way than David does. After school and before bed, she especially needs all the love, attention, and cuddles. 

Today I had a pretty hard day with several hours of intensive Zoom calls. They ended right as the kids got home from school and when I was done, I just felt this deep exhaustion and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with my kids and never look at a computer again 🤪. 

I realized that's probably how Evy (and David, but mostly Evy) typically feels after a long day. I can tell that it's especially draining for her. So I was reminded to be extra gentle with her emotions, especially on school days when there's just so much going on and it can feel pretty intense, especially at that age. And especially to us introverts 🫠 Anyone else have highly emotional kiddos?
My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling away from dropping the kids at school. A little baby needed a home until his adoptive family could come get him. 

At the time, we didn’t know his name, his gender, or anything about him. We were told he was healthy and we’d get more details later.

And we said yes! We thought it would be longer but his adoptive family is BOOKING it to get here and take him home forever. He will be so loved!!

I love that we get to share moments like these with our kids. I know they’ll remember them for a looong time to come.
Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not ev Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not every moment needs to be filled with productivity. And sometimes I don't need to multitask. Easier said than done for me anyway. But I'm trying to intentionally practice slowing down. How do you try to slow down?

Shoes @naot.northamerica
Dress @shopbohme
Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋 Do Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋

Doing fun hairstyles with Ev has been a new way for us to bond, especially since Cleo's joined us. Would you try this one??
I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I n I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I need to rush while the baby's asleep to get things done to rather bringing them along with me when I can. 

Cleo loves being worn and, for the time being, is super content just watching me unload the dishwasher, make dinner, or tag along to grab Evy and David from the bus. 

And I'm way more at peace when I don't feel like I need to rush or time is running out. We have time and most things we have to do in a day aren't urgent.
Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 What was the first food you gave to your baby?
  • Family
  • Marriage
  • fitness
  • travel
  • Life & Finances
  • Home
  • Blog
    • Family
    • Marriage
    • fitness
    • travel
    • Life & Finances
    • Devotional
  • About
    • Contact
  • Devotional

Living the Sweet Wife

  • Home
  • Blog
    • Family
    • Marriage
    • fitness
    • travel
    • Life & Finances
    • Devotional
  • About
    • Contact
  • Devotional

Baby, Family, Guest Post, Kids, Marriage, Motherhood · July 5, 2017

6 Ways Marriage Changes After Having Kids

When I became a mom (three years ago this week!) I was thrilled. Nothing had quite prepared me for the love I felt for my little son. I felt the same way when my daughter was born two years later.

At the risk of sounding slightly cheesy, I truly felt like this new job – being a mom – was what I was made for.

But, I think it’s safe to also say that nothing had quite prepared me for the changes in my marriage. Because marriage changes after kids. It just does. Some of the changes are awesome. Some are, well, just changes.

Let’s start with the awesome changes!

1 | You see your spouse through new eyes

I LOVE watching my husband be a daddy. It is a side of him that I never saw to this extent and honestly you guys, it’s attractive.

Watching his gentle side come out is really special; I love how he loves our kids. And seeing how my kids adore their Daddy makes my heart so happy.

2 | Your bond is deepened by your mutual love for your kids

This is the best. Because no one else in the entire word loves your kids as much as you, except for your spouse. No one else feels as proud as you at their little milestones, except for your spouse.

Most people will get a little bored after hearing you brag on your kids for ten minutes but your spouse will gladly join in!

At times my husband and I have sat together after our kids are in bed and looked at their pictures haha. Parenting together definitely creates a special bond that you didn’t have before.

But, some changes aren’t quite as exciting.

3 | Less time together as a couple

Okay, this is pretty obvious but it’s an important one to mention. Once you have a baby, quality one on one time reduces drastically. It’s just going to happen. You’ve got a little person (or people) to take care of now. You can’t just drop everything to go out on a hot date.

My husband has a hard time just telling me about his day without my 2 year old interrupting with “mama, mama, mama” a million times. (Yeah, we’re working on that!)

4 | Less spontaneity

Pretty much everything in life takes a little more planning and forethought once you have kids.

Instead of spending extra time in front of the mirror before having dinner out, you’ll be stuffing sippy cups, diapers, and outfit changes into the diaper bag and searching for your toddler’s shoes.

Wanting to go on a spontaneous date? Hmm yeah probably not going to happen, unless you happen to have a babysitter on call!

5 | Less sleep

From being up at night with a newborn, to calming your four year old who had a bad dream, to sharing the bed with a squirming toddler who was afraid of the storm, kids will ultimately result in less sleep for you. And less sleep is bound to affect your marriage sometimes.

Less sleep can make you irritable (or is it just me?)

When you’re tired, vegging on the couch and watching TV sounds a lot more fun than that game or project you used to enjoy doing with your spouse.

And a romp under the sheets sounds a lot less appealing when you know you’ll be up with the baby in an hour.

6 | More responsibility

Besides having less time together, less spontaneity, and less sleep, you now have the big responsibility of little people to care for. And kids, they’re needy.

Before having kids I said “I will always put my husband first. It’s a no-brainer.” Yeah …. Well, I want to, I really do, but it’s tough once those oh-so-cute-but-needy little humans come along.

So, why am I sharing all of this? Do I want you to never have kids? Haha no of course not. But I think it’s important to acknowledge the changes, both the awesome ones and the hard ones, as you seek to make your marriage a priority.

I love this reminder from Sheila Gregoire, blogger at ToLoveHonorandVacuum.com:

Don’t put your marriage on the backburner once babies come. Once you’re parents, your marriage matters more, not less, because now other people are counting on you. So cling to each other and get ready for the most exciting ride of your life!

But how can you make your marriage a priority when you have kids? To start, acknowledge that it is important. Then, remember that it’s the little things that make a big difference.

Sure, you can’t be as spontaneous now, but work on becoming a better planner and plan special times for the two of you. Leave your husband a note telling him how much you love seeing him be a dad. Surprise him by showing up at work with the kids just to say hi. Be goofy together, even when (or especially when) you’re running on little sleep. As your kids grow, teach them not to interrupt so that you can actually talk to each other haha.

Basically, the state of your marriage after kids is up to you two. It’s your decision how you will allow the changes that come to affect your marriage. But I would encourage you (as I encourage myself!) to embrace the awesome changes – growing closer because of them – and then roll with the punches during some of the tough ones.

To re-quote Sheila, “Cling to each other and get ready for the most exciting ride of your life!” And it truly is exciting.

This guest post was written by Rebekah Gaspar of The Tex-Mex Mom.  Read her bio below, check out her beautiful website, and follow her here:

Pinterest | Facebook | Bloglovin‘ | Instagram

  • Author
  • Recent Posts
Rebekah Gaspar
Rebekah Gaspar
Blogger at The Tex-Mex Mom
Rebekah is a stay at home mom living in the great state of Texas. She is married to a wonderful husband of five years and is mom to two precious kiddos. Blogging is her favorite hobby and she loves to share easy recipes, book reviews, and most of all encouragement for other moms.
Rebekah Gaspar
Latest posts by Rebekah Gaspar (see all)
  • 6 Ways Marriage Changes After Having Kids - July 5, 2017

In: Baby, Family, Guest Post, Kids, Marriage, Motherhood · Tagged: baby, bond, change, child, children, family, happy marriage, kids, love, marriage, marriage advice, marriage tips, newborn, Relationships, sleep

join the club

You’ll Also Love

Embracing the Journey: A Guide for Couples Navigating Goals TogetherEmbracing the Journey: A Guide for Couples Navigating Goals Together
Forgiveness is an Attitude not a FeelingForgiveness is an Attitude not a Feeling
Lessons I learned in My First 2 Months as a Foster ParentLessons I Learned My First 2 Months as a Foster Parent
Next Post >

In-Car Essentials For a Long Road Trip

Hi! I'm Chelsea and we're the Damon's. We spent the last two years in WA state paying off student loans and just bought our first house in SC! I love a smooth black coffee, Josh's first love is the Seattle Sounders. Our kids are huge dorks and constantly make us laugh and we all love spending as much time outside as possible.

join the club

Recent Posts

3 Ways to Make the End of Summer a Blast for the Kids

3 Ways to Make the End of Summer a Blast for the Kids

3 Ways I Create Quality Time With My Husband

3 Ways I Create Quality Time With My Husband

The Best Tips + Packing List for Hiking with Kids and Babies

The Best Tips + Packing List for Hiking with Kids and Babies

Embracing the Journey: A Guide for Couples Navigating Goals Together

Embracing the Journey: A Guide for Couples Navigating Goals Together

Forgiveness is an Attitude not a Feeling

Forgiveness is an Attitude not a Feeling

One of The Best Things You Can Do as a Parent Is Have a Healthy Marriage

One of The Best Things You Can Do as a Parent Is Have a Healthy Marriage

Categories

  • Family
  • Marriage
  • fitness
  • travel
  • Life & Finances
Shop Presets

Instagram

Happy birthday to our 9 year old goob! We are so p Happy birthday to our 9 year old goob! We are so proud of this boy. We are constantly told by others how kind and sweet his is. I mean, we know it too, but it means even more when his character shines through even when mom and dad aren't watching. We love you so much "Puppy!"
More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽ More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽
The start of a new school year has always felt lik The start of a new school year has always felt like more of a “New Years” to me than January 1st ever did. The air starts getting more crisp (thank goodness), the leaves start to change, and the house is quieter (now that the kids are in school, and just during the day, ha). 

Every year around this time I can clearly look back and see how our family has changed. Last year, we had just said goodbye to the boys (our first foster placement) and our family was making sense of the whirlwind that had just happened over the summer. This year, David is way more into soccer, Evy is telling me about the conversations the girls at school are having (she’s a huge people-watcher), and of course Cleo is getting so big! Her first two teeth made their appearance this week and we’re also pretty sure she said “Dada” the other night. 

It really goes by so fast. But little memories like the ones in these photos will last. I remember going apple picking with sweet family friends as a kid and I love doing that for our kids now. 

What traditions have you tried to pass down to your kids?
Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Sinc Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Since she's been a baby, I've been learning that she needs love in a very different way than David does. After school and before bed, she especially needs all the love, attention, and cuddles. 

Today I had a pretty hard day with several hours of intensive Zoom calls. They ended right as the kids got home from school and when I was done, I just felt this deep exhaustion and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with my kids and never look at a computer again 🤪. 

I realized that's probably how Evy (and David, but mostly Evy) typically feels after a long day. I can tell that it's especially draining for her. So I was reminded to be extra gentle with her emotions, especially on school days when there's just so much going on and it can feel pretty intense, especially at that age. And especially to us introverts 🫠 Anyone else have highly emotional kiddos?

trending now

  • So I know the title of this post says, “What men want most in a wife,” but to be more realistic, this is about what men need most in a wife. Like men, there are a lot of things that we (women) would really like in a husband. Like, it’d be a huge plus if he looked like Chris Hemsworth. But that’s not really what we need in order to have a positive relationship with our spouse. If we married him, we probably think he’s pretty cute, anyway. Take a look at these 5 things a man really needs in a wife, and if you can think of anything else, share your thoughts in the comments below! 5 Things men want most in a wife
  • Do you ever wish that sometimes you could just write a long list to your spouse of all the things he does that drive you insane?? I have done this. 8 of the Worst Marriage Habits
  • Disrespect in marriage can go both ways. Women can react to disrespect from their husbands in many ways. I'm here to share a few positive ways women can react to disrespect in their marriages in order to handle it well and steer their marriage in the direction of grace and kindness again. How to Handle Disrespect in Marriage
  • Sure, they say don’t go to bed while you’re still angry, but sometimes husbands and wives just need some space! That being said, there are healthy ways and unhealthy ways (productive and hurtful, if you will) to get space away from a spouse. Let’s talk about those. The Right and Wrong Way To Give Your Spouse Space

instagram

Follow @chelsealeighdamon

Happy birthday to our 9 year old goob! We are so p Happy birthday to our 9 year old goob! We are so proud of this boy. We are constantly told by others how kind and sweet his is. I mean, we know it too, but it means even more when his character shines through even when mom and dad aren't watching. We love you so much "Puppy!"
More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽ More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽
The start of a new school year has always felt lik The start of a new school year has always felt like more of a “New Years” to me than January 1st ever did. The air starts getting more crisp (thank goodness), the leaves start to change, and the house is quieter (now that the kids are in school, and just during the day, ha). 

Every year around this time I can clearly look back and see how our family has changed. Last year, we had just said goodbye to the boys (our first foster placement) and our family was making sense of the whirlwind that had just happened over the summer. This year, David is way more into soccer, Evy is telling me about the conversations the girls at school are having (she’s a huge people-watcher), and of course Cleo is getting so big! Her first two teeth made their appearance this week and we’re also pretty sure she said “Dada” the other night. 

It really goes by so fast. But little memories like the ones in these photos will last. I remember going apple picking with sweet family friends as a kid and I love doing that for our kids now. 

What traditions have you tried to pass down to your kids?
Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Sinc Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Since she's been a baby, I've been learning that she needs love in a very different way than David does. After school and before bed, she especially needs all the love, attention, and cuddles. 

Today I had a pretty hard day with several hours of intensive Zoom calls. They ended right as the kids got home from school and when I was done, I just felt this deep exhaustion and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with my kids and never look at a computer again 🤪. 

I realized that's probably how Evy (and David, but mostly Evy) typically feels after a long day. I can tell that it's especially draining for her. So I was reminded to be extra gentle with her emotions, especially on school days when there's just so much going on and it can feel pretty intense, especially at that age. And especially to us introverts 🫠 Anyone else have highly emotional kiddos?
My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling away from dropping the kids at school. A little baby needed a home until his adoptive family could come get him. 

At the time, we didn’t know his name, his gender, or anything about him. We were told he was healthy and we’d get more details later.

And we said yes! We thought it would be longer but his adoptive family is BOOKING it to get here and take him home forever. He will be so loved!!

I love that we get to share moments like these with our kids. I know they’ll remember them for a looong time to come.
Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not ev Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not every moment needs to be filled with productivity. And sometimes I don't need to multitask. Easier said than done for me anyway. But I'm trying to intentionally practice slowing down. How do you try to slow down?

Shoes @naot.northamerica
Dress @shopbohme
Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋 Do Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋

Doing fun hairstyles with Ev has been a new way for us to bond, especially since Cleo's joined us. Would you try this one??
I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I n I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I need to rush while the baby's asleep to get things done to rather bringing them along with me when I can. 

Cleo loves being worn and, for the time being, is super content just watching me unload the dishwasher, make dinner, or tag along to grab Evy and David from the bus. 

And I'm way more at peace when I don't feel like I need to rush or time is running out. We have time and most things we have to do in a day aren't urgent.
Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 What was the first food you gave to your baby?
Just a Wednesday afternoon and a book 📖 👀 th Just a Wednesday afternoon and a book 📖
👀 the comfiest heels I own by @naot.northamerica 
#naotic

Explore

  • About
  • My Book
  • Contact

join the club

Shop My Favorites

  • About
  • Instagram
  • About
  • Media Kit | Guest Posting
  • Privacy Policy & T&C’s

Copyright © 2023 Living the Sweet Wife · Theme by 17th Avenue