Being confident many times comes down to what we choose to believe and how (or how often) we choose to think about ourselves. Take a look at these 5 ways you can remind yourself that you have the ability to be confident.
1 You are smart
You might not be smart in the same ways other people are smart, but that doesn’t mean you’re not smart. Find what you’re good at and own that. It’s ok to also know what you’re not good at, don’t be embarrassed by that. There’s no shame in asking for help or asking for someone to teach you how to do something. You can’t be good at everything. But you can be great at something. You have the ability to help people and to be confident with what you do know. Once you find what you’re good at, don’t be content with that. Take that skill or knowledge and nurture it and grow it. Use it to find your niche in the workplace and in life.
2 You don’t need to wait for others to become friends with you
You have the ability to decide who you want to be friends with. If you’re new to a place, try not to be worried about how you’ll make friends or who you’ll be friends with. Decide that the ball is in your court. You have the ability to walk up to that guy or girl, compliment them on something you notice (not many people will turn away a kind word, even if they do think you’re weird) and then ask them an open question. Making friends can be easy when you decide it’s your choice whether or not you want to.
3 Your likes and dislikes are a big part of what makes you you. Be honest.
Have you ever had a friend or acquaintance who will agree with everything you say, ever opinion you give? After a while, it gets old. Many people forget that there is an easy way to disagree without rejecting the other person completely. Saying something like, “Yeah I totally see your point, but I usually tend to think of it this way…” Or, “You like strawberry ice cream? My husband loves it too but I just can’t eat it.” Having your own opinions and having the ability to disagree will make you a much better critical thinker and able to stand up for your beliefs if the time comes. It also just makes you a better friend in general. If you see a pal about to make a bad decision, let them know, and let them know you care.
4 Caring more about others than yourself isn’t quite as bad as you think.
I’ve had a lot of conversations with a lot of people who struggle with insecurities. Abusive relationships aside (that’s another post altogether), the person usually at the center of an insecure person’s thoughts is usually… themselves. I know, I know- it sounds a little harsh. But think of all the great people who have given their life for caring for others. Do you think their minds were plagued with thoughts like, “I wonder what they think of me?” The answer is no, because they were way too busy caring for others’ needs (rather than their opinions). When we change our focus from what other people think to what other people need, and we begin to care about the person more than their opinions, our thoughts begin to shift away from ourselves, and our insecurities virtually become nonexistent.
Also read: Insecurity In Marriage and How to Fix It
5 Your body is intricate and beautiful
If you’re being healthy and making good choices with the food you eat, no one can blame you- not even yourself- for the body you were born with. Everyone has the ability to keep up their body well. Let’s face it, it doesn’t take any extra time out of the day to choose the clean foods in the grocery store versus the ones that do harm to your body. Care about yourself and your family enough to make healthy choices. After that, dress and care for your body in a way that makes you feel confident. If you can feel confident leaving the house with #messyhairdontcare, then by all means! If you need a little mascara to look like you’re not a zombie and that helps you to forget about yourself while you’re out, then wear some! You don’t need to do what others do when they leave the house, just what makes you feel comfortable and allows you to leave the insecure thoughts behind.
What do you do when you feel insecurity creeping in? What reminds you to be confident again? Share with a friend who needs to be reminded to be confident today!
All my best,