More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽ More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽
The start of a new school year has always felt lik The start of a new school year has always felt like more of a “New Years” to me than January 1st ever did. The air starts getting more crisp (thank goodness), the leaves start to change, and the house is quieter (now that the kids are in school, and just during the day, ha). 

Every year around this time I can clearly look back and see how our family has changed. Last year, we had just said goodbye to the boys (our first foster placement) and our family was making sense of the whirlwind that had just happened over the summer. This year, David is way more into soccer, Evy is telling me about the conversations the girls at school are having (she’s a huge people-watcher), and of course Cleo is getting so big! Her first two teeth made their appearance this week and we’re also pretty sure she said “Dada” the other night. 

It really goes by so fast. But little memories like the ones in these photos will last. I remember going apple picking with sweet family friends as a kid and I love doing that for our kids now. 

What traditions have you tried to pass down to your kids?
Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Sinc Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Since she's been a baby, I've been learning that she needs love in a very different way than David does. After school and before bed, she especially needs all the love, attention, and cuddles. 

Today I had a pretty hard day with several hours of intensive Zoom calls. They ended right as the kids got home from school and when I was done, I just felt this deep exhaustion and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with my kids and never look at a computer again 🤪. 

I realized that's probably how Evy (and David, but mostly Evy) typically feels after a long day. I can tell that it's especially draining for her. So I was reminded to be extra gentle with her emotions, especially on school days when there's just so much going on and it can feel pretty intense, especially at that age. And especially to us introverts 🫠 Anyone else have highly emotional kiddos?
My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling away from dropping the kids at school. A little baby needed a home until his adoptive family could come get him. 

At the time, we didn’t know his name, his gender, or anything about him. We were told he was healthy and we’d get more details later.

And we said yes! We thought it would be longer but his adoptive family is BOOKING it to get here and take him home forever. He will be so loved!!

I love that we get to share moments like these with our kids. I know they’ll remember them for a looong time to come.
Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not ev Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not every moment needs to be filled with productivity. And sometimes I don't need to multitask. Easier said than done for me anyway. But I'm trying to intentionally practice slowing down. How do you try to slow down?

Shoes @naot.northamerica
Dress @shopbohme
Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋 Do Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋

Doing fun hairstyles with Ev has been a new way for us to bond, especially since Cleo's joined us. Would you try this one??
I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I n I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I need to rush while the baby's asleep to get things done to rather bringing them along with me when I can. 

Cleo loves being worn and, for the time being, is super content just watching me unload the dishwasher, make dinner, or tag along to grab Evy and David from the bus. 

And I'm way more at peace when I don't feel like I need to rush or time is running out. We have time and most things we have to do in a day aren't urgent.
Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 What was the first food you gave to your baby?
Just a Wednesday afternoon and a book 📖 👀 th Just a Wednesday afternoon and a book 📖
👀 the comfiest heels I own by @naot.northamerica 
#naotic
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Dating, Marriage, Relationships · July 26, 2017

How To Be a More Fun and Spontaneous Wife

When I took a moment to slow down my mommy-whirlwind, I realized that I wasn’t leaving any time to be fun with my husband like we used to be when we were daing or first married. And who wants to have a fun-less marriage?? Not me. And I know my husband doesn’t either. He didn’t propose to me to get a live-in house cleaner and nanny. I’m guessing your hubs didn’t propose for that reason either. So, I’ve made a list of ways that we can remember to be a more fun wife!

Do you ever feel like you’re just not as much fun as you used to be? You totally realize it. You feel sorry about it. But at the same time, life is a lot harder now and you’re being pulled in, like, 300 directions and everyone needs you! You don’t have the luxury of being fun anymore!

Or do you?

I hear ya, mama. I totally do.

I went through a time in my life (and still have the occasional relapse) where I totally turn into a cat-wife. Unaffectionate, cold, maybe even a little stuck up- because, of course, I have the harder job and don’t get told thank you nearly enough.

To be really honest, I can be kind of a poop face to my poor husband sometimes. I can be snooty, short with him, distant, or just too busy for him. I am a working mom, after all. And being so busy, I sometimes have the nerve to get annoyed with him when he wants to spend time with me or have fun with me! Poor guy. Don’t get me wrong, he’s not perfect either. But when I take the time to think about it, a lot of the things he does that I don’t like- I would totally do the same things if I was in his shoes. Or I can at least see why he does them.

When I took a moment to slow down my mommy-whirlwind, I realized that I wasn’t leaving any time to be fun with my husband like we used to be when we were dating or first married. And who wants to have a fun-less marriage??

Not me. And I know my husband doesn’t either. He didn’t propose to me to get a live-in house cleaner and nanny. I’m guessing your hubs didn’t propose for that reason either. So, I’ve made a list of ways that we can remember to be a more fun wife!

Make time to be spontaneous

What am I not saying?

What I’m not saying is that you need to be a wannabe millennial free spirit who always has time and spare cash for avocado toast and trips to Lake Tahoe. Just be willing and able to let go of the messy house that ought to be cleaned if there are a few quality moments to spend with bae (your husband).

One great way to make this more possible is to stay on top of other tasks that could come in the way of being spontaneous. For example, have the laundry done ahead of time so you’re not embarrassed to have friends over last-minute.

Want some more tips on how to live in the moment as a mom? Check out this post I wrote for Dwell + Slumber!!

Get off the phone in bed!

Ok. I’m not going to tell you that you’re not allowed to have your phone in bed. We live in 2017 after all. But. For goodness sake, don’t spend every night lying right next to each other in the same bed staring at separate screens not talking! Many times, I’ll take a few minutes to scroll through Instagram before he gets in bed, that way I can chill with him by the time he gets in bed. Sometimes, because he doesn’t mind this, if he’s scrolling through his phone, I’ll look with him and we’ll laugh at funny videos together and then talk about them. But what’s great is when we’re both off our phones and just talking (obvious, I know). But it’s sad to me how rare and special moments like those have become these days!

Let go a little bit

Trust me, I know how it feels to be constantly needed and pulled in 300 directions. That being said, sometimes the dishes can wait. Or sometimes you can say to hubs, “Hey, if you help me tackle this, we’ll have more time to hang out together.” Don’t be afraid to ask for help for the sake of spending more quality time with the hubs.

You and your husband are not going to look back and remember the clean sink and folded laundry. You’ll remember the moments you spent enjoying time together!

Learn his love language

Not only that. Learn yours. If, together, you learn your love languages, you’ll be able to feel like your love cup is at its tippy top and you’ll feel way more willing to show your hubs love in the way that he feels it. (Not that you should necessarily need to have a full cup in order to show him love. But it does make it easier. Check out this post I wrote on selfishness). Does he love gifts? Surprise him? Quality time? See point #1. Physical touch? You get the picture. Trust me, he’ll probably appreciate it more than you know. But as I said, try to openly communicate about your love language needs as well. It’ll make it so much easier!

Don’t take yourself too seriously

There’s something to be said for thinking critically, having standards, and standing up for yourself. But if you have a husband who genuinely loves you (chances are, you do), but also love to tease you and joke around, play along! Don’t be afraid to be sassy in good fun. Remember that, even though your work might be calling your name, taking a small moment to enjoy life with your husband will do wonders for your relationship and overall mood! If he’s trying to have fun with you, it’s because he loves you and wants to be your friend. Just remember that.

Initiate sex

Plain and simple. Don’t make him ask for it every single time and hope that he gets lucky tonight. If you have to take time to mentally prepare, do that. Tell yourself that today is a day where you’re going to pursue him and look forward to it! Even if all you do to make him get the picture that you’re wanting sex tonight is let your eyes linger on him a little too long, your husband will LOVE that you’re asking for it instead of him. It really is just a small thing, but it makes a world of a difference to him!

Find a common interest

Chances are, you don’t like everything the same. That’s ok! Josh, my hubs, LOVES soccer. He’s obsessed. I think his Facebook news feed is so boring because it’s literally only sports highlights. He tends to scroll by all the things that I would stop and read, like new babies and weddings that that kind of crap. Even so, when he’s watching a game, I know he loves when I watch it with him. That being the case, I’ll do my best to finish up work and join him. The surprising part? It’s actually not that bad. I love getting excited with him when Clint Dempsey scores for the Seattle Sounders!

My point is, celebrate your individual interests- together! You’ll learn to appreciate each other’s unique talents and personalities and maybe even learn something!

Meet him for lunch at work

Whether your husband loves or hates his job, try mixing up his day a little bit by paying him a visit at work! It may just help his day go by faster and give him a little reminder that you love and think about him when he’s gone. Just like us, men like to feel needed and missed.

Slow down and chill out

Especially if you have kids, but even if you don’t, taking a little break from the grind of life can be really helpful to reset and have some quality moments where you can remember a time when life was simpler. Even through the crazy, hopefully you’ll be able to reconnect as a team and feel more in tune when you dive back in after the vacation is over. And by “vacation” I don’t mean you need to spend $3000 on trip to Fiji (but, I mean, if you can, why not?). Know some college students? Pay them $30 and get out the house! Even if you don’t spend any money for the rest of the night, at least you’ll have a few hours to talk without being interrupted. Some of my favorite “dates” I’ve had with my husband are simply when we go on a long walk together and talk. Knowing that you didn’t spend any money when you come back home at night is an added bonus 🙂

Remember your children are not the first priority

I’ve come to realize that there’s often a common denominator on days when I don’t feel like I have time for my husband. You know what it is? My kids. Gosh I love them to death, but sometimes they just wear. me. out! And there have been plenty of times when my husband is talking to me, we’re interrupted by one of our babies, and then I stop listening to him. Yes, kids need to feel heard, but they also need to learn that they don’t come first.

Catch that?

Your kids don’t come first.

Think of what message we might be sending our kids when we drop everything we’re doing to accommodate them without asking them to wait patiently for our attention? Not only that, but we’re sending the message that it’s ok to put daddy on the back burner because they come first.

Showing your kids (through your interactions with your husband) that your marriage is strong and you respect and prioritize each other will give your kids an amazing example of a strong and healthy marriage. That will help them to feel safe and secure even on days when you and the hubs aren’t doing so hot!

So, to prepare for our long road trip, I’ve been doing some research and compiling a list of things and tips that will help us actually enjoy the drive and not go insane. Here’s that list:

When I took a moment to slow down my mommy-whirlwind, I realized that I wasn’t leaving any time to be fun with my husband like we used to be when we were daing or first married. And who wants to have a fun-less marriage?? Not me. And I know my husband doesn’t either. He didn’t propose to me to get a live-in house cleaner and nanny. I’m guessing your hubs didn’t propose for that reason either. So, I’ve made a list of ways that we can remember to be a more fun wife!

In: Dating, Marriage, Relationships · Tagged: bed, children, cool, date, dating, exciting, fun, fun marriage, fun wife, funny, husband, initiate, interests, kids, life, love, love language, man, marriage, mom, momlife, mother, motherhood, outgoing, phone, priority, sex, spontaneous, wife, wifelife, woman, Work

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Comments

  1. Ciara Myers says

    July 26, 2017 at 12:10 am

    Your last two blog posts are SO similar to mine! THIS IS FREAKING ME OUT so I had to comment haha – we are so in tune right now! Also, I hope I’m not the millennial you’re talking about, because I’m obsessed with avocados and we just got back from Lake Tahoe haha!

    Regardless, I love this post and I 100% agree with your main points! “He didn’t propose to me to get a live-in house cleaner and nanny.” Spot on, girl!

    http://www.veiledfree.com

    • Chelsea says

      July 26, 2017 at 4:18 am

      That is so funny! Totally stalking you! 😉 I have to check out your posts! It’s so funny too. I was halfway done with writing this yesterday when I saw another blogger friend post something similar with a little more of a mom life spin to it and I was like “Oh I hope she doesn’t think I copied her!!”

      Just makes me think there’s a need for this kind of post if it’s on all our minds!

      • Christina Kempthorne says

        August 9, 2021 at 7:47 pm

        Love Love love it…

        You nailed Girl!

        Thanks

        Looking forward to your next posts

  2. Sara | Mrs. Imperfect says

    July 28, 2017 at 11:49 am

    Lol, I can be a poop face to my husband at times as well. I think these tips also can help with our view of ourselves and our role as wives.

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Hi! I'm Chelsea and we're the Damon's. We spent the last two years in WA state paying off student loans and just bought our first house in SC! I love a smooth black coffee, Josh's first love is the Seattle Sounders. Our kids are huge dorks and constantly make us laugh and we all love spending as much time outside as possible.

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More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽ More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽
The start of a new school year has always felt lik The start of a new school year has always felt like more of a “New Years” to me than January 1st ever did. The air starts getting more crisp (thank goodness), the leaves start to change, and the house is quieter (now that the kids are in school, and just during the day, ha). 

Every year around this time I can clearly look back and see how our family has changed. Last year, we had just said goodbye to the boys (our first foster placement) and our family was making sense of the whirlwind that had just happened over the summer. This year, David is way more into soccer, Evy is telling me about the conversations the girls at school are having (she’s a huge people-watcher), and of course Cleo is getting so big! Her first two teeth made their appearance this week and we’re also pretty sure she said “Dada” the other night. 

It really goes by so fast. But little memories like the ones in these photos will last. I remember going apple picking with sweet family friends as a kid and I love doing that for our kids now. 

What traditions have you tried to pass down to your kids?
Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Sinc Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Since she's been a baby, I've been learning that she needs love in a very different way than David does. After school and before bed, she especially needs all the love, attention, and cuddles. 

Today I had a pretty hard day with several hours of intensive Zoom calls. They ended right as the kids got home from school and when I was done, I just felt this deep exhaustion and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with my kids and never look at a computer again 🤪. 

I realized that's probably how Evy (and David, but mostly Evy) typically feels after a long day. I can tell that it's especially draining for her. So I was reminded to be extra gentle with her emotions, especially on school days when there's just so much going on and it can feel pretty intense, especially at that age. And especially to us introverts 🫠 Anyone else have highly emotional kiddos?
My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling away from dropping the kids at school. A little baby needed a home until his adoptive family could come get him. 

At the time, we didn’t know his name, his gender, or anything about him. We were told he was healthy and we’d get more details later.

And we said yes! We thought it would be longer but his adoptive family is BOOKING it to get here and take him home forever. He will be so loved!!

I love that we get to share moments like these with our kids. I know they’ll remember them for a looong time to come.

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More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽ More photos from this weekend 🍂🍏⚽
The start of a new school year has always felt lik The start of a new school year has always felt like more of a “New Years” to me than January 1st ever did. The air starts getting more crisp (thank goodness), the leaves start to change, and the house is quieter (now that the kids are in school, and just during the day, ha). 

Every year around this time I can clearly look back and see how our family has changed. Last year, we had just said goodbye to the boys (our first foster placement) and our family was making sense of the whirlwind that had just happened over the summer. This year, David is way more into soccer, Evy is telling me about the conversations the girls at school are having (she’s a huge people-watcher), and of course Cleo is getting so big! Her first two teeth made their appearance this week and we’re also pretty sure she said “Dada” the other night. 

It really goes by so fast. But little memories like the ones in these photos will last. I remember going apple picking with sweet family friends as a kid and I love doing that for our kids now. 

What traditions have you tried to pass down to your kids?
Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Sinc Evy has always been very much a Mommy's girl. Since she's been a baby, I've been learning that she needs love in a very different way than David does. After school and before bed, she especially needs all the love, attention, and cuddles. 

Today I had a pretty hard day with several hours of intensive Zoom calls. They ended right as the kids got home from school and when I was done, I just felt this deep exhaustion and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with my kids and never look at a computer again 🤪. 

I realized that's probably how Evy (and David, but mostly Evy) typically feels after a long day. I can tell that it's especially draining for her. So I was reminded to be extra gentle with her emotions, especially on school days when there's just so much going on and it can feel pretty intense, especially at that age. And especially to us introverts 🫠 Anyone else have highly emotional kiddos?
My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling My phone rang this morning just as we were pulling away from dropping the kids at school. A little baby needed a home until his adoptive family could come get him. 

At the time, we didn’t know his name, his gender, or anything about him. We were told he was healthy and we’d get more details later.

And we said yes! We thought it would be longer but his adoptive family is BOOKING it to get here and take him home forever. He will be so loved!!

I love that we get to share moments like these with our kids. I know they’ll remember them for a looong time to come.
Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not ev Sometimes I just need to remind myself that not every moment needs to be filled with productivity. And sometimes I don't need to multitask. Easier said than done for me anyway. But I'm trying to intentionally practice slowing down. How do you try to slow down?

Shoes @naot.northamerica
Dress @shopbohme
Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋 Do Butterfly hair! It's easier than it looks 🦋

Doing fun hairstyles with Ev has been a new way for us to bond, especially since Cleo's joined us. Would you try this one??
I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I n I'm working to adjust my mindset from thinking I need to rush while the baby's asleep to get things done to rather bringing them along with me when I can. 

Cleo loves being worn and, for the time being, is super content just watching me unload the dishwasher, make dinner, or tag along to grab Evy and David from the bus. 

And I'm way more at peace when I don't feel like I need to rush or time is running out. We have time and most things we have to do in a day aren't urgent.
Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 Baby's first taste of solids: banana edition 🍌 What was the first food you gave to your baby?
Just a Wednesday afternoon and a book 📖 👀 th Just a Wednesday afternoon and a book 📖
👀 the comfiest heels I own by @naot.northamerica 
#naotic
When you get home from the event and immediately t When you get home from the event and immediately turn into Adam Sandler..

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