Now that we still have some sunlight hanging aroun Now that we still have some sunlight hanging around after the kids go to bed, my new thing is sipping a glass of wine on the back patio while making small talk with Josh and praying the kids stay in bed.
 
I've been obsessed with cleaning our house recently but I've been so good about it, I have nothing left to clean or tidy right now and I'm left to face the things I don't really want to think about like the fact that I miss my kids when they're at school or how I really want to fill this house up with some more of them 😅 

At any rate, one of my simple pleasures in life is decluttering and purging unused things and I feel like I've accomplished a lot!! What about you?
Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over here and I think it might be working 😉 Today the kids had TWOsday at school and they were so sweet. David wore a tie (I don't exactly get how it tirles in to Twosday but the kids were happy so..) and Evy "twinned" with a couple of sweet friends in her class. It's so sweet when you see your own kids building their own friendships. It just loosens a little piece of anxiety I've had about parenthood since David was still in my tummy. How did you spend your TWOsday??

Sandals @naotfootwear 💕
Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Jos Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Josh in a quiet house - the kids slept over my parent's last night. Got up, raced to clean the kitchen as fast as I could while my coffee was brewing. The coffee won this time. 

I recorded a Reel while getting ready. Went to the place where we were going to meet my fam a bit early so Josh and I could get in a walk. Then we got coffee, went to a huge antique store (sadly left with nothing but took pictures of my faves so I can remember to come back) and went to lunch with the kids and my parents. Love easy-going and fun days like these 🖤
Back in the day,I was talking with someone about m Back in the day,I was talking with someone about marriage.Josh and I had been married for a few years at that point but this guy was still single. ..

He told me he was studying to get his masters in counseling and he wanted to be a marriage counselor one day.I thought "Hey that's pretty cool" but, curious,because,you know, he was single. 

Anyway, after we'd been talking a few minutes about our interest in helping married couples, he leaned in and said, "You know, I have this theory on marriage.." "Oh yeah?" I said (pretty curious to hear what theories this guy had for all of marriage for everyone everywhere). 

He said, "I believe that every single problem in marriage boils down to communication."

At the time, I didn't really know what to say. I'm more of a *reflector* and then I come up with what I wish I had said later.

Here's what I wish I had said: "Um. Yeah I don't think so. I mean sure, communication helps with a lot of issues. But what about selfishness,⠀addiction,⠀past hurt and trauma, etc? Communication will help people work through those issues but they're connected to much deeper issues that concern the heart--not just your communication skills."

We are all broken, very human, beings and when left to our own devices,⠀we don't have all the tools necessary to "fix" ourselves or our spouse's problems. We can talk until we're blue in the face but we just can't fix ourselves. 

What we do need, is to lean on the Creator who made all things good and makes all things new. To understand that we are not the main characters here. The whole world and everything in it points to Christ and His redeeming power. And yes, he often works that out through us and often through communication. But it's not communication that saves marriages. It's Jesus.

I was just thinking about that today and wanted to get it off my chest. What role do you think communication plays?
Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁 Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁
So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 Love my littlest niece, Eva ❤️
Let's hash something out together: what's somethin Let's hash something out together: what's something you do or used to fight about in your marriage/relationship regularly?

Do you feel like the issue is/was pretty cut and dry? 

Or was there an underlying issue that bubbled up in different ways?

Curious to know your thoughts. 

When Josh and I were first married, we fought a lot. We were pretty low-income, didn't have great jobs, and had a wee baby. While our fights were often about the grocery list, the real issue was that we were SCARED. 

Scared of the adult life we had just stepped into. It was kind of like jumping into a puddle you don't think is that deep until after it's too late and now your socks are completely drowning 🚣🏼‍♀️ 

Luckily, though, they dry off over time, don't they?

After lots of learning and working really hard (both at our jobs and relationship) things started to ease up. We started to see that there was a light at the end of the tunnel and even though we weren't there yet, it gave up hope to carry on together ❤️
Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. O Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. Or if you can't leave the house, sit in the kitchen with a glass of wine. Make time to talk. And make it easier by doing things together. It's so so important ❤️
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Baby, Family, Motherhood, Toddler · September 22, 2015

Struggles of a Young Mom

Let me know if you can relate to any of these...

Let me know if you moms out there can relate to any of these…

All the girls my age still have their pre-pregnancy bodies.

It’s nice to have the standard of a nice body be lowered for those of us that have had children. Anybody ever heard, “Hey you look great for having a baby!” Whatever, I’ll take it.

But hey, tiger stripes are cool, right?

I have a cute bag, but it looks like this on the inside.Mom Bag

Notice the baby socks, the jingly toy that I no longer hear when I walk. I didn’t plant these things; in fact, I’m surprised I didn’t have a pack of wipes and a sippy cup like I usually do. (Ps. there’s a diaper hidden in the zip pocket).

I no longer know what the kids are up to these days (even though I’m only about 1.5 years older than them).

I find myself saying things like “I’ve been seeing the girls wear things like this on pinterest and when I drive to school.” And then I wince a little bit when I hear my voice and the voice of my mother become one in my flashback to middle school (minus the Pinterest part).

I no longer care what the kids are up to these days.

Is it weird that I don’t find a lot of the music on the pop stations as appealing as I did in high school? Or that I wish I had all my old mix tapes from middle and high school?

There’s so many new words and abbreviations. Hangry, yolo, bae. I have to ask my little sisters what these things mean!

Also, is it weird that I can tell the girls who are on Pinterest vs the girls who are not? If you think about it, you totally can! (Not to judge those girls at all, about 50% of my internet time is spent on Pinterest).

I’m a lot more confident and a lot more insecure about a whole new set of things.

What I used to care so much about in high school and college doesn’t matter anymore- the clothes, who your friends were, what you did over the weekend. Having 0 plans Friday night is actually something I can look forward to.

A whole new set of things to be insecure about has set in:

  • So and so’s mom looks great and she’s only 6 weeks postpartum!
  • Baby Sally already knows her please and thank you’s and my baby still calls me “dada.”
  • Darn it, why is it that I only remember baby sign language after I’m cleaning up the meal?!

When I walk around Liberty campus (or the mall, the park, whatever applies to you), I feel old. Even if everyone thinks I’m fitting in, I feel 10 years older than everyone else I’m with.

Even if technically I’m only a year older than graduating seniors, I feel like I’m ten years older. Our lives could not be more different. I’m thinking about what I’m making for dinner and if it’s baby-led-weaning compatible. I’m thinking about that insurance bill we got in the mail the other day and who I need to call, spend 50 minutes on the phone with, and get nowhere again (sorry, mini rant there).

I was the first one from my high school graduating class to get married and have a baby.

I’m 23 now, going on 24 and I can still count on one hand the amount of people from high school who are in the same stage of life as me.

I’m the “mom friend.”

Out of most of our friends, we are the home that can never lock our door because there’s a large chance that someone will come over for something as soon as we do. I have an unhealthy lack of fear when I’m home alone and I hear our backdoor open, because it’s probably one of the kids coming to do laundry or use our kitchen, whatever it may be.

We have the best advice for headaches, colds, sore muscles, etc.

We have good “boy” advice because, you know, we’ve been there.

At least once a week I think to myself “Oh, I forgot to have lunch today…”

This is probably just another mom thing in general.

Everyone asks my husband and I “So how are you doing?”

And we know what they mean. “Are you guys fighting a lot with the stress of being young, married, and raising a child?” Can we trust that your smiles are true happiness and not a facade of parents who wish they had done things differently?”

The answer is, “We’re rolling with it and we’re happy!” If you’re worried about our marriage, offer to babysit! We’d love a date night!

Yes, our life is way different than the life a lot of our friends live, but we wouldn’t change a thing!

There’s moments when we will feel a small pang of jealousy at the spontaneity and and control our friends have over their own lives. That’s being completely honest. But at the same time, they don’t yet know the joy is it to have your child scream and laugh in excitement when you walk in the door, or to be the one to make it better when they have the sniffles and can’t sleep. It’s draining, but so worth it.

 

I’m sure there are one hundred more “struggles” I could add to this list but these were the ones that were in the front of my mind. Tell me your struggles as a young mom, average mom, older mom. I’d love to hear!

Chels

In: Baby, Family, Motherhood, Toddler · Tagged: babies, children, marriage, mom, Struggles, young

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Comments

  1. SuE says

    September 22, 2015 at 10:01 pm

    I love this post!! I found myself laughing out loud, so I guess I can relate 🙂 even if I am an older mom. I think that somehow experience makes you feel older, and birthing a baby is certainly a growing and memorable experience. One that is even hard to relate to those who have not experienced it.

  2. KAtie says

    September 23, 2015 at 4:33 am

    I love your honesty here. And I’m so glad you wrote this because I think it is going to make you smile half a dozen years from now when all of the insecurities change yet again. It’s funny how life does that in stages and phases. I feel like I was just in your shoes and then I blinked and there were no more diapers, no more babies. At some point we started worrying about educational choices and developmental activities, sports versus academics and developing each child’s strengths and gifts. No matter what the stage, I’m so thankful we can give all that worry to God. Blessings to your little family!

    • Chelsea says

      September 23, 2015 at 4:48 am

      Thanks Katie! Such great insight from a mom in the next stage. I do my best to savor and ponder every moment because I know they won’t last! Families are such a blessing!

      • Brittany says

        May 21, 2016 at 12:56 am

        Can I hug you? This is my life. 100%
        25 with a 2&1/2 yr old boy and step mom to a 5&1/2 yr old girl… I need friends like you

  3. Sam // DIY just cuz says

    September 23, 2015 at 7:04 am

    I can relate to you so much 🙂 I’m 23 and I definitely know what you mean about being “different” than people, sort of. Not so much people I went to high school with…a surprising number of those people ended up having children, though I’m not sure they were “planning on it” since most of them did when they were in high school. However, everyone I knew from college is in a way different place than me. It’s not a bad thing, it’s just a thing. “Having 0 plans Friday night is actually something I can look forward to.” YES.

  4. Sheena Neil says

    September 24, 2015 at 3:27 am

    I can definitely relate to a few of those points. I am proud of my tiger tripes and to be honest I am happier being a mum than I was before my boy came into my world. I guess he has given me a purpose and I feel honoured to wear the mum badge. 🙂

  5. Maya says

    September 25, 2015 at 4:03 pm

    Hi,

    Great post. I read your post and it literally sounds like you wrote about me. I graduated high school in May and was married to my first love by September that same year. We just celebrated out 10 year wedding anniversary and we have a almost 9 year old and a 3 year old. I felt the same when I had my first son. I am 28 and when I go out in public with my kids I always get stares especially when I am with my older one. I would not change a thing about my decisions and the way my life has turned out. I enjoy it so much.

  6. Natasha says

    September 25, 2015 at 5:29 pm

    Hi Chelsea! I love how you summed this up – You wouldn’t change a thing! And that’s how to look at it. This is your own personal journey and the path meant for you to take. Believe me, you’ll be able to share and help other women with all of the experience and wisdom you’re gaining. God bless!

  7. Crystal says

    September 25, 2015 at 7:22 pm

    I can certainly relate. I was a teen mom, so by the time the people my own age had babies, I was on my fourth and fifth. My advice to you is make friends with mom you are in the same stage of life as. Look for playgroups or MOPS to find them. All my friends used to be 10+ years older than me and now I am the ‘old’ mom.

    • Chelsea says

      September 29, 2015 at 3:31 am

      That’s great advice. I would love to find a MOPS group somewhere around here!

  8. Shann Eva says

    September 27, 2015 at 1:48 am

    It’s funny .I’m an older mom, yet I was still the first one of my friends to have a baby, so I can totally relate . Thank you for such a great, honest post .

    • Chelsea says

      September 29, 2015 at 3:29 am

      Funny how motherhood can bring so many different people together. Thanks for reading, Shann Eva!

  9. Cindy Calzone says

    September 27, 2015 at 5:23 am

    I really liked this post! It was cute and honest! I think it is the first time I have encountered your blog, but I plan on being a forever reader now! I wasn’t very young when I had my son (26) but I still felt a lot of the same things you do, especially with friends who had not yet had kids, or even get married yet. Don’t worry about all that…sounds like you are doing fabulous!

    http://www.HometownQueenBee.blogspot.com <3

    • Chelsea says

      September 29, 2015 at 3:28 am

      YAY thanks Cindy!!

  10. Izabela says

    September 27, 2015 at 9:27 am

    What a great and honest post. Sadly I’m not married and don’t have a kid so I can’t relate to you. But I’m sure that you wouldn’t want to change a thing about your life.

  11. Cliona says

    September 27, 2015 at 2:47 pm

    Aw, such a nice post. I remember feeling quite left out when I had my first daughter (who is 20 now!) because I was the only one of my friends who had a child. I wouldn’t change it for the world though. It flies by so quickly.

  12. Jaimee says

    September 28, 2015 at 6:00 am

    I love how genuine your posts are. Motherhood is something I hope I get to experience in my future, but I don’t think I could handle it now. I look up to all mothers. You’re all very strong women!

    • Chelsea says

      September 29, 2015 at 3:27 am

      Thank you Jaimee!!
      Chels

  13. The conservative mommy says

    September 28, 2015 at 1:03 pm

    Hahaha great post! Little ones sure do change EVERYTHING!

  14. Laura says

    September 28, 2015 at 2:02 pm

    I am not a mom yet, but this had me laughing out loud! Thanks for the read!

    xx.
    Laura
    http://www.theaverygrace.com

    • Chelsea says

      September 29, 2015 at 3:26 am

      Great! Thanks for stopping by!

  15. eliz frank says

    September 28, 2015 at 9:58 pm

    Your journey and experiences are so special that no one can ever take them from you. Life is about all sorts of trials and unexpected events, and we are always the richer for them. <3

    • Chelsea says

      September 29, 2015 at 3:26 am

      I agree completely, thank you Eliz 🙂

      • Eliz Frank says

        October 2, 2015 at 8:07 am

        Thank you Chels,
        l loved your post, and Yolo, Bae, and Hangry are a mystery to me too. Ha! 😉

  16. Tammy Greene says

    September 29, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    This is such a great post. My purse looks a lot like that too. I was just telling my sister the other day ( as I was digging thru my disaster of a purse ) that I am probably one of few people who have a ninja mask in her purse 🙂

    I am an older mom and I still have many insecurities. I’m not sure they will ever go away. Each stage of life and parenthood brings a whole new set of things to worry about. But that’s OK. It’s all part of the journey.

    Wish I could babysit for you so you could get a date night 🙂 I definitely know how important that is.

  17. Tori says

    September 29, 2015 at 5:12 pm

    This is awesome! I could totally relate! I don’t even have a handbag anymore, now I use an actual back pack for s changing bag (with two under twos it is needed!)

  18. Michael says

    September 29, 2015 at 11:33 pm

    This was very interesting for me to read, as I am not a mom… 😉

    I’m a bit older than you, but I’ve experienced several similar feelings, as a man. I returned to college a few years ago, and was shocked at how much older I felt than my peers.

    Music was different, people were different, attitudes had changed. Of course, I know longer cared about fitting in, so that had changed in me, as well!

    Thank you for sharing with us!

  19. Diedre says

    September 29, 2015 at 11:50 pm

    I wouldn’t call myself an older mom at 32, but I am a little older than you. I think the hardest thing for me is balancing it all-keeping a home, working outside of the home, having a healthy marriage and being a good mom/role model for my girls. Thanks for sharing.

  20. Eileen says

    September 30, 2015 at 2:41 pm

    I can totally relate to when I was your age. I too married at 23, had babies right away! I really enjoyed reading your post. Very truthful! It does get easier! I will be following your story!!

  21. Kailei says

    September 30, 2015 at 4:03 pm

    So much truth to this! I was 25 when I had my first, but I still absolutely get it. Especially all the insecurities. I wish I could say that I actually know what I’m doing! haha. But I guess we just have to figure it out day by day. Even with all the struggles, being a mom is the best thing ever!

  22. Nicole Nemeth says

    September 30, 2015 at 4:38 pm

    I can totally relate to a lot of these! I had my daughter when I was 17, and she’s now turning 8 at the end of October. Being the only parent in my group of friends for a long time definitely made me feel strange but I wouldn’t change it for the world! I love my daughter and husband, and our life together!

  23. Rachelle says

    September 30, 2015 at 4:56 pm

    I loved this so much. You are so real and transparent. 🙂

  24. Sheryl says

    September 30, 2015 at 4:58 pm

    Thanks for sharing!

  25. Dreammerin says

    September 30, 2015 at 5:24 pm

    I have no experience but it’s a lot of inspirations !! I hope you visit my blog too! Greetings!!

  26. Whitney Trevillian says

    September 30, 2015 at 6:15 pm

    Chelsea, I wish I looked the way you do and I haven’t even HAD a baby!!! You look good, girl!! And from the sounds of it, you are ROCKING being a young mom!! Keep doing you!!! <3

    -Whitney, @handspuncinema

  27. Hannah Diane says

    September 30, 2015 at 7:28 pm

    Yes, yes, yes! I’m a new mom at 20- got married at 19. These are SO true!

  28. Amarylis says

    September 30, 2015 at 7:50 pm

    That picture of your bag made me laugh so hard. Very funny post!

  29. Ashley says

    September 30, 2015 at 8:17 pm

    Oh yes. Though I may not be in the young mom category anymore, I had my first at 24 and was the first of my friends to have a little. But the change in my life was similar to yours. My bag was filled with random crap but I no longer cared. The things that were important changed because my life changed, and it was all for the better!

  30. Scott says

    October 1, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    We chose to wait until having kids. While we not have pre-teens, all our high school classmates are grandparents!

  31. Natalie slater says

    October 2, 2015 at 3:04 am

    I love this post. I think a lot of moms feels like this. Just the other day my hubby and I were talking about how nice it would be to go back to teen life when your biggest concern is what your plans are for the weekend. Oh, to be 16 again.

  32. ReBecca says

    October 2, 2015 at 8:24 am

    I wouldn’t know the struggles personally but plenty of my friends have kids so I’ve seen them!

  33. Jessica says

    October 2, 2015 at 9:36 am

    Love what you said about offering to babysit! For real! But seriously, people can be so nosy 😉

  34. McKaye says

    October 2, 2015 at 3:08 pm

    I loved this post so much. I could relate to every one of those. You seem young and vibrant. While I feel like an old soul, I too am young. It’s nice to know your not the only one in your boat.

  35. Cate says

    October 4, 2015 at 5:44 pm

    Girl, I get it! I’m also 23 with an almost 4-year-old and a 16-month-old. Everything here applies to me and I have almost no friends simply because my life went a different direction than my high school/college friends. I love seeing it ghee moms who get it. 🙂

  36. Laura says

    October 5, 2015 at 4:43 pm

    This is such an honest post. This is the kind of thing I like to read. I felt this way when I had my first child at 23, so I understand. I waited until I was 29 to have my second son and now that I will be 40 this December I look back and laugh at the things I used to think. You will definitely look back and smile or even laugh. Now, even at my age, I have new worries. Mostly about still looking young, lol. Luckily, so far, I don’t look my age, Let’s hope it lasts a while longer.

  37. Healing Mama says

    October 15, 2015 at 7:34 pm

    I really love this post. I like seeing things from your perspective!

  38. Trish says

    October 19, 2015 at 1:50 pm

    This is a great and honest post – and I think it will speak to a lot of other young mothers!

  39. Chelsea says

    October 19, 2015 at 2:13 pm

    Chelsea- It may be hard sometimes for you being the “mom” friend, but the truth is, I’m beyond jealous of you. I’m the same age as you and want a baby more than anything in the world. My fiance and I are waiting until we get married and until I finish grad school, but the truth is that I feel a part of me is missing until I have a baby. I know I was born to be a mom. I wish I didn’t have to wait for 3 more years.

    • Chelsea says

      October 20, 2015 at 1:13 am

      Wow 3 years is a long time to wait! I don’t mean to discourage you at all. I’ve just never been good with waiting for anything! 26 is still a wonderful age to start a family. My mom was 28 when she stared having kids. I will say that I do love being the mom friend and being a mom at 23. Have your fiance spend some time will some really cute and well behaved babies and maybe he’ll catch the fever too 🙂

  40. Lindsey says

    November 18, 2015 at 9:29 pm

    I can absolutely relate to all of these. I was 22 when I had my daughter, 25 now. I didn’t get a chance to graduate college before she was born, so now I’m going “back-to-school” while all my friends are getting married and having babies. I just keep trying to tell myself that I’ll only be 40 when she graduates!

    P.S. You have a great sense of humor. Young mommies unite!

  41. Taylor says

    December 30, 2015 at 1:52 am

    I have to be honest, sometimes posts like these sting a little. Some people wish they could’ve been young moms, but for one reason or another, weren’t able to. My husband and I were both in marriage-bound relationships at 20, but they ended abruptly and tragically (my husband’s girlfriend died, I called off my wedding). My husband and I met when we were 23 and 26, married less than 1.5 years later, and have spent the last 3.5 years trying to conceive. So for a long time we did feel different from our friends…because we were the only ones without kids. Heartbreakingly. We’ve recently become foster-to-adopt parents of two 7- and 8-year-old little boys, and are again so different from our friends! Now we have the oldest kids, and they both have special needs and severe behaviors, so no one we know can relate! Funny how life works…

    • Chelsea says

      December 31, 2015 at 4:13 am

      Hi Taylor,
      Thanks so much for your honest comment and taking the time to read the post. To be honest myself, one of the reasons why I wrote “Struggles of a Young Mom” was in an attempt to reach out to others who could relate to my stage of life because my husband and I know so few. My husband and I have pretty much just started to make friends who are older with kids because we don’t know many young families who live near us. I have close friends who have just adopted a baby girl with special needs (they also have a daughter with cerebral palsy and 2 boys of their own). Taking care of children with special needs is such a wonderful sacrifice for any parent to take on, let alone willingly choosing to do so. I have a lot of respect for you and your husband choosing to love and care for those boys and I know you will make wonderful parents. I pray that you will be able to find groups (whether online or in person) who can relate and encourage you through this long but rewarding journey!
      Chels

  42. Misty says

    June 4, 2016 at 4:22 am

    This is me right now. Sitting at home on a Friday with no plans and thankful I have a moment to be on Pinterest. Except I have no friends but I’m okay with that I’m totally happy being a mother and a wife at 23. Probably the only thing I’ve ever felt good at. Good post made me feel not so alone.

  43. Micah says

    June 5, 2016 at 4:04 am

    I love this! I got married a month before graduating high school,
    We both just turned 25 and are expecting our 4th baby this summer! I can absolutely relate to this! This is also why I joined MOPS and mostly hang out with moms that are mostly 5 years older than me because we are just in the same place. Most have been married about the same amount of time, kids the same age etc. I’m also trying to really remember to be a roll model for the young wives and moms coming up, and try to be that older mom friend for them as well because it was such a struggle to not relate with other people my age about 5 years ago!

    Thanks for sharing!

  44. Katie says

    June 5, 2016 at 11:15 pm

    I’m 22 and have a 5 month old and another one on the way! My husband and I were driving the other day and Taylor Swift’s 22 came on the radio and I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry. The hardest thing for me is that as an extrovert, I still want to go out and have fun! Making other mom friends is tough, seems like most of the women I meet are older and are on their last baby and have a kid in middle school, lol. All the girls I grew up with are just now graduating college, whereas I finished highschool and college early and worked for a year before I got married. It can be fun to be the one everyone comes to for life advice, but it can also be somewhat lonely when you’re the one wanting advice! I’m glad that there are other young moms out there who can relate!

  45. Natalie says

    December 14, 2016 at 7:48 pm

    Thanks so much for this. I’m actually just 10 weeks pregnant with our first, and I’ll be 23 when the baby is born. We have other married friends, but we are the first to have kids. We just moved to a new area where there are 4 or 5 married couples who are all almost 30, with no kids. I’m actually nervous about telling them about our pregnancy because I’m so afraid of what they’ll think. This baby wasn’t planned, but is a huge blessing nonetheless. We are just in a very different place in life than people even a decade older!

  46. Adrianna says

    October 9, 2018 at 7:46 pm

    I am a new young mom, THe age before 20, and I absolutely loved this. I could relate in so many ways. At first after having the baby I wanted to resort to my old ways of wearing belly shirts or anything I want and I wasnt comfortable and I realised it’s because I dont feel like a young girl who can do that anymore. Now I wear layers of clothing and they dont show any skin and aren’t really tight but they are just as cute and makes me feel more like an appreciable mother, and I’m fine with it

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Hi! I'm Chelsea and we're the Damon's. We spent the last two years in WA state paying off student loans and just bought our first house in SC! I love a smooth black coffee, Josh's first love is the Seattle Sounders. Our kids are huge dorks and constantly make us laugh and we all love spending as much time outside as possible.

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Now that we still have some sunlight hanging aroun Now that we still have some sunlight hanging around after the kids go to bed, my new thing is sipping a glass of wine on the back patio while making small talk with Josh and praying the kids stay in bed.
 
I've been obsessed with cleaning our house recently but I've been so good about it, I have nothing left to clean or tidy right now and I'm left to face the things I don't really want to think about like the fact that I miss my kids when they're at school or how I really want to fill this house up with some more of them 😅 

At any rate, one of my simple pleasures in life is decluttering and purging unused things and I feel like I've accomplished a lot!! What about you?
Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over here and I think it might be working 😉 Today the kids had TWOsday at school and they were so sweet. David wore a tie (I don't exactly get how it tirles in to Twosday but the kids were happy so..) and Evy "twinned" with a couple of sweet friends in her class. It's so sweet when you see your own kids building their own friendships. It just loosens a little piece of anxiety I've had about parenthood since David was still in my tummy. How did you spend your TWOsday??

Sandals @naotfootwear 💕
Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Jos Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Josh in a quiet house - the kids slept over my parent's last night. Got up, raced to clean the kitchen as fast as I could while my coffee was brewing. The coffee won this time. 

I recorded a Reel while getting ready. Went to the place where we were going to meet my fam a bit early so Josh and I could get in a walk. Then we got coffee, went to a huge antique store (sadly left with nothing but took pictures of my faves so I can remember to come back) and went to lunch with the kids and my parents. Love easy-going and fun days like these 🖤

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  • So I know the title of this post says, “What men want most in a wife,” but to be more realistic, this is about what men need most in a wife. Like men, there are a lot of things that we (women) would really like in a husband. Like, it’d be a huge plus if he looked like Chris Hemsworth. But that’s not really what we need in order to have a positive relationship with our spouse. If we married him, we probably think he’s pretty cute, anyway. Take a look at these 5 things a man really needs in a wife, and if you can think of anything else, share your thoughts in the comments below! 5 Things men want most in a wife
  • Do you ever wish that sometimes you could just write a long list to your spouse of all the things he does that drive you insane?? I have done this. 8 of the Worst Marriage Habits
  • Disrespect in marriage can go both ways. Women can react to disrespect from their husbands in many ways. I'm here to share a few positive ways women can react to disrespect in their marriages in order to handle it well and steer their marriage in the direction of grace and kindness again. How to Handle Disrespect in Marriage
  • Sure, they say don’t go to bed while you’re still angry, but sometimes husbands and wives just need some space! That being said, there are healthy ways and unhealthy ways (productive and hurtful, if you will) to get space away from a spouse. Let’s talk about those. The Right and Wrong Way To Give Your Spouse Space

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Now that we still have some sunlight hanging aroun Now that we still have some sunlight hanging around after the kids go to bed, my new thing is sipping a glass of wine on the back patio while making small talk with Josh and praying the kids stay in bed.
 
I've been obsessed with cleaning our house recently but I've been so good about it, I have nothing left to clean or tidy right now and I'm left to face the things I don't really want to think about like the fact that I miss my kids when they're at school or how I really want to fill this house up with some more of them 😅 

At any rate, one of my simple pleasures in life is decluttering and purging unused things and I feel like I've accomplished a lot!! What about you?
Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over here and I think it might be working 😉 Today the kids had TWOsday at school and they were so sweet. David wore a tie (I don't exactly get how it tirles in to Twosday but the kids were happy so..) and Evy "twinned" with a couple of sweet friends in her class. It's so sweet when you see your own kids building their own friendships. It just loosens a little piece of anxiety I've had about parenthood since David was still in my tummy. How did you spend your TWOsday??

Sandals @naotfootwear 💕
Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Jos Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Josh in a quiet house - the kids slept over my parent's last night. Got up, raced to clean the kitchen as fast as I could while my coffee was brewing. The coffee won this time. 

I recorded a Reel while getting ready. Went to the place where we were going to meet my fam a bit early so Josh and I could get in a walk. Then we got coffee, went to a huge antique store (sadly left with nothing but took pictures of my faves so I can remember to come back) and went to lunch with the kids and my parents. Love easy-going and fun days like these 🖤
Back in the day,I was talking with someone about m Back in the day,I was talking with someone about marriage.Josh and I had been married for a few years at that point but this guy was still single. ..

He told me he was studying to get his masters in counseling and he wanted to be a marriage counselor one day.I thought "Hey that's pretty cool" but, curious,because,you know, he was single. 

Anyway, after we'd been talking a few minutes about our interest in helping married couples, he leaned in and said, "You know, I have this theory on marriage.." "Oh yeah?" I said (pretty curious to hear what theories this guy had for all of marriage for everyone everywhere). 

He said, "I believe that every single problem in marriage boils down to communication."

At the time, I didn't really know what to say. I'm more of a *reflector* and then I come up with what I wish I had said later.

Here's what I wish I had said: "Um. Yeah I don't think so. I mean sure, communication helps with a lot of issues. But what about selfishness,⠀addiction,⠀past hurt and trauma, etc? Communication will help people work through those issues but they're connected to much deeper issues that concern the heart--not just your communication skills."

We are all broken, very human, beings and when left to our own devices,⠀we don't have all the tools necessary to "fix" ourselves or our spouse's problems. We can talk until we're blue in the face but we just can't fix ourselves. 

What we do need, is to lean on the Creator who made all things good and makes all things new. To understand that we are not the main characters here. The whole world and everything in it points to Christ and His redeeming power. And yes, he often works that out through us and often through communication. But it's not communication that saves marriages. It's Jesus.

I was just thinking about that today and wanted to get it off my chest. What role do you think communication plays?
Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁 Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁
So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 Love my littlest niece, Eva ❤️
Let's hash something out together: what's somethin Let's hash something out together: what's something you do or used to fight about in your marriage/relationship regularly?

Do you feel like the issue is/was pretty cut and dry? 

Or was there an underlying issue that bubbled up in different ways?

Curious to know your thoughts. 

When Josh and I were first married, we fought a lot. We were pretty low-income, didn't have great jobs, and had a wee baby. While our fights were often about the grocery list, the real issue was that we were SCARED. 

Scared of the adult life we had just stepped into. It was kind of like jumping into a puddle you don't think is that deep until after it's too late and now your socks are completely drowning 🚣🏼‍♀️ 

Luckily, though, they dry off over time, don't they?

After lots of learning and working really hard (both at our jobs and relationship) things started to ease up. We started to see that there was a light at the end of the tunnel and even though we weren't there yet, it gave up hope to carry on together ❤️
Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. O Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. Or if you can't leave the house, sit in the kitchen with a glass of wine. Make time to talk. And make it easier by doing things together. It's so so important ❤️
Top knots over crop tops 😜 Top knots over crop tops 😜

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