1, 2, or 3?? @balielf making me feel pretty today 1, 2, or 3?? @balielf making me feel pretty today in all these gorgeous colors! 😍
#ad This past weekend I decided to do something re #ad This past weekend I decided to do something really fun for the kids and create a scavenger hunt for them with Kinder Joy eggs at the end! They had so much fun going throughout the house and the yard finding their clues and a special surprise was waiting for them at the end! They had so much fun putting their Jurassic World Dominion surprise together (David is obsessed with dinosaurs 🦖) as well as exploring the app that comes as a download from the Kinder Joy egg! Fun little surprises like these go such a long way and making the kids feel special 💗 
#KinderJoy #JurassicWorldDominion @kinderus
Now that we still have some sunlight hanging aroun Now that we still have some sunlight hanging around after the kids go to bed, my new thing is sipping a glass of wine on the back patio while making small talk with Josh and praying the kids stay in bed.
 
I've been obsessed with cleaning our house recently but I've been so good about it, I have nothing left to clean or tidy right now and I'm left to face the things I don't really want to think about like the fact that I miss my kids when they're at school or how I really want to fill this house up with some more of them 😅 

At any rate, one of my simple pleasures in life is decluttering and purging unused things and I feel like I've accomplished a lot!! What about you?
I've been DIYing my hair for five (?) ish years no I've been DIYing my hair for five (?) ish years now and while I can't claim I've always done it perfectly, I've found a great routine that works for my hair and saves so much $$$ in the process!! Are you brave enough to DIY your hair??
Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
I think this hairdo is perfect 👌 for anything y I think this hairdo is perfect 👌 for anything you want to do without getting your hair in your face: eating hot wings, riding on a boat, working out, the list goes on. Plus, you can wear it up ⬆️ or down ⬇️
Wife, mom, runner, writer, artist, or just the cle Wife, mom, runner, writer, artist, or just the cleaning lady?? ​😜
Josh is an old soul 🥰 and tonight he and I are Josh is an old soul 🥰 and tonight he and I are going to get to see a band from the 70s that he loves!! Any guesses who it is??
^^ Here's a fun hairstyle for a (date) night out 🌃
I think a sleek pony is honestly so cute for date I think a sleek pony is honestly so cute for date night OR work! I'm always wearing my hair up anyway, right?? Might as well make it cute 🥰
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Life & Finances, Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships · July 24, 2016

How to get your husband to help around the house more

Have you ever been cleaning your home and wish that you could just make a clone of yourself who would care as much and do just as good of as job as you? Do you ever wonder why your husband just doesn’t take initiative to clean up after himself or, goodness forbid, you? While our husbands are never going to be perfect housemaids, there are a few tips I’ve come up with if you’re struggling to get your husband to help out around the house...

How to get your husband to help more

Have you ever been cleaning your home and wish that you could just make a clone of yourself who would care as much and do just as good of as job as you? Do you ever wonder why your husband just doesn’t take the initiative to clean up after himself or, goodness forbid, you? While our husbands are never going to be perfect housemaids, there are a few tips I’ve come up with if you’re struggling to get your husband to help out around the house…

Be specific

It took me waaay too long to finally figure out that my husband wasn’t simply just trying to make me mad- he just wasn’t a mind reader! To be honest, I was probably just being stubborn. Deep down inside, I really really really just wanted him to figure out what he should do on his own… and then actually do it without me having to ask. Well after too many frustrated days and petty fights, I’m here to tell you that men are not, in fact, mind readers.  After too much time  wondering why my he never just took it upon himself to tidy up around the house, I finally discovered that one of the reasons why my husband never did was actually because he never noticed the mess. I know, you’re thinking, “Ok, suuure…” But really, though, there are certain messes that I think different people can be blind to. I hate when there are toys on the floor, but I’m totally ok with having clothes all over the bedroom. Take time to figure out if there are messes that your spouse is blind to, and then show extra grace in that area, and be extremely specific when you want something done about it.

Let him know your daily schedule

If you’re like me, most days you’re probably ok with doing a bunch of the housework. My husband works longer hours than me, I can do the dishes and laundry more often than him. But the times when I start to get frustrated with his amount of help around the house are the times when I have several things going on at once and I start to feel overwhelmed. Personally, at this very moment, I am a wife/mom, employee, blogger, and student. To say my plate is full would be an understatement. Letting my husband know that I have several assignments to get done later so I’ll need extra help around the house puts it right out there in the beginning that I expect a little more from him that day.

Give him plenty of time

It took me a long time to learn that my priorities in any given moment do not automatically sync up with my husband’s priorities. This was super hard for me to learn. If the first thing on my mind for the day is cleaning up before we leave for the weekend, but my husband’s is… something else that totally unimportant to me, I go from 0-60 in 3.5 seconds on the “Are you kidding me??” scale. There’s probably nothing that frustrates me more than when I think my husband should be helping me when he’s not. That being said, I can often forget that my husband may, himself, have a list of things to do that are important to him, and my list doesn’t necessarily trump all other lists.

I’ve found that it helps to ask, “What are you wanting to get done today?” and then I communicate my list of goals for the day. Before we even start on our tasks, we communicate what the other person can help with, that way no one is left wondering, “What are you doing and why aren’t you helping me?”

In short, plan ahead and communicate.

Make it clear he’s not doing it for you, but it’s his responsibility too

This is the single more important thing you can make clear when it comes to housework. Let me first say, however, that I have never believed that marriage is 50/50. If you do believe that, you’re in for a lot of, “That’s not my job!”, “I did it last time!” fights.

A huge part of making this point clear to your spouse is simply about the language we use to communicate what we want done. I’ve tried really hard over time to change my language from, “Hey could you tidy up for me today?” to “Hey could you tidy up today?” I do this because I want to make it uber clear that my husband is not cleaning up for me. He’s cleaning up because this is his home also, his mess also, and my sole job as a wife and mother is not to simply clean up after everyone. I’ve already started to try to embed this mindset in our less than 2-year-old son. He has to help clean up the toys he played with before bedtime.

Again, all that being said, there will be so many times in your marriage that you will have to do more than your share. The sooner anyone is able to swallow that the better. That goes for both spouses. There will be times when you’ll have to pick up the ball that was dropped or keep things from slipping through the cracks because your spouse wasn’t up to it this time around. If it’s a habitual offense, talk about it! Address the issue! But always, always show so much grace.

Don’t nag

Again, this has almost everything to do with language. And attitude. Just listen to the difference between, “Why do you always leave your stuff lying around?” to “Hey husband, can you pick up your stuff when you’re done with what you’re doing?” Even though with both statements you’re just trying to get your husband to pick up his stuff, you can expect a pretty different reaction from your spouse depending on which phrase you use. To the first one, you’ll get a whole lot of defensiveness, backlash, and pushback, even if it’s just a simple talk. But even if your husband is good enough to not outwardly react any of those ways, you can be sure he feel a lot different about doing what you ask on the inside.

The second way of asking lets your husband know that you value what he’s doing right now, even if it’s relaxing- because we all just need a moment; but it’s important to you that he does what you ask. If you’re about to stick to just simply asking your husband to do a task, without implying frustrating character flaws, the attitude and atmosphere of your home will feel- to both of you- much more positive, open, and understanding.

Consider adjusting your standards

Before I married my husband, I was under the assumption that most people were raised like me. Of course, my husband would have the same standard of cleanliness and the same desire for a clean-ish home. When I realized that we did not at all have the same standards, I was shocked and mad at him. Over time, however, I’ve found that both of our standards have blended and become normalized. I may allow for a little more mess around the house, and he has stepped up his game with helping out. Over time, and after open communication, we’ve come to our own standard of cleanliness and who does what, when. Normalizing your standards will happen when you’re able to be flexible and understand that having a clean and organized home is not the most important thing, you’re relationship with your husband is. There are many nights when I let the dishes sit in the sink until the next day because my husband wants to sit on the porch with me.

So tell me, what’s gotten your husband to help out? What has helped you to help him “get it;” that cleaning up isn’t just for you? Leave your thoughts and comments below and share with a mama in need!

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In: Life & Finances, Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships · Tagged: chores, cleaning, communicate, help, home, house, housewife, housework, husband, mom, mother, nag, nagging, sahm, schedule, standards, stay at home mom, wife, Work

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Hi! I'm Chelsea and we're the Damon's. We spent the last two years in WA state paying off student loans and just bought our first house in SC! I love a smooth black coffee, Josh's first love is the Seattle Sounders. Our kids are huge dorks and constantly make us laugh and we all love spending as much time outside as possible.

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Now that we still have some sunlight hanging aroun Now that we still have some sunlight hanging around after the kids go to bed, my new thing is sipping a glass of wine on the back patio while making small talk with Josh and praying the kids stay in bed.
 
I've been obsessed with cleaning our house recently but I've been so good about it, I have nothing left to clean or tidy right now and I'm left to face the things I don't really want to think about like the fact that I miss my kids when they're at school or how I really want to fill this house up with some more of them 😅 

At any rate, one of my simple pleasures in life is decluttering and purging unused things and I feel like I've accomplished a lot!! What about you?
Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over here and I think it might be working 😉 Today the kids had TWOsday at school and they were so sweet. David wore a tie (I don't exactly get how it tirles in to Twosday but the kids were happy so..) and Evy "twinned" with a couple of sweet friends in her class. It's so sweet when you see your own kids building their own friendships. It just loosens a little piece of anxiety I've had about parenthood since David was still in my tummy. How did you spend your TWOsday??

Sandals @naotfootwear 💕
Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Jos Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Josh in a quiet house - the kids slept over my parent's last night. Got up, raced to clean the kitchen as fast as I could while my coffee was brewing. The coffee won this time. 

I recorded a Reel while getting ready. Went to the place where we were going to meet my fam a bit early so Josh and I could get in a walk. Then we got coffee, went to a huge antique store (sadly left with nothing but took pictures of my faves so I can remember to come back) and went to lunch with the kids and my parents. Love easy-going and fun days like these 🖤

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1, 2, or 3?? @balielf making me feel pretty today 1, 2, or 3?? @balielf making me feel pretty today in all these gorgeous colors! 😍
#ad This past weekend I decided to do something re #ad This past weekend I decided to do something really fun for the kids and create a scavenger hunt for them with Kinder Joy eggs at the end! They had so much fun going throughout the house and the yard finding their clues and a special surprise was waiting for them at the end! They had so much fun putting their Jurassic World Dominion surprise together (David is obsessed with dinosaurs 🦖) as well as exploring the app that comes as a download from the Kinder Joy egg! Fun little surprises like these go such a long way and making the kids feel special 💗 
#KinderJoy #JurassicWorldDominion @kinderus
Now that we still have some sunlight hanging aroun Now that we still have some sunlight hanging around after the kids go to bed, my new thing is sipping a glass of wine on the back patio while making small talk with Josh and praying the kids stay in bed.
 
I've been obsessed with cleaning our house recently but I've been so good about it, I have nothing left to clean or tidy right now and I'm left to face the things I don't really want to think about like the fact that I miss my kids when they're at school or how I really want to fill this house up with some more of them 😅 

At any rate, one of my simple pleasures in life is decluttering and purging unused things and I feel like I've accomplished a lot!! What about you?
I've been DIYing my hair for five (?) ish years no I've been DIYing my hair for five (?) ish years now and while I can't claim I've always done it perfectly, I've found a great routine that works for my hair and saves so much $$$ in the process!! Are you brave enough to DIY your hair??
Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
I think this hairdo is perfect 👌 for anything y I think this hairdo is perfect 👌 for anything you want to do without getting your hair in your face: eating hot wings, riding on a boat, working out, the list goes on. Plus, you can wear it up ⬆️ or down ⬇️
Wife, mom, runner, writer, artist, or just the cle Wife, mom, runner, writer, artist, or just the cleaning lady?? ​😜
Josh is an old soul 🥰 and tonight he and I are Josh is an old soul 🥰 and tonight he and I are going to get to see a band from the 70s that he loves!! Any guesses who it is??
^^ Here's a fun hairstyle for a (date) night out 🌃
I think a sleek pony is honestly so cute for date I think a sleek pony is honestly so cute for date night OR work! I'm always wearing my hair up anyway, right?? Might as well make it cute 🥰
I video called Josh last night with this hair in a I video called Josh last night with this hair in and he asked, "Are you wearing pigtails??" And I was like, "No! .. well. Kind of."

I thought this style was super cute!! And a really quick way to do something *different* with everyday hair. Would you try it??

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