Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over here and I think it might be working 😉 Today the kids had TWOsday at school and they were so sweet. David wore a tie (I don't exactly get how it tirles in to Twosday but the kids were happy so..) and Evy "twinned" with a couple of sweet friends in her class. It's so sweet when you see your own kids building their own friendships. It just loosens a little piece of anxiety I've had about parenthood since David was still in my tummy. How did you spend your TWOsday??

Sandals @naotfootwear 💕
Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Jos Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Josh in a quiet house - the kids slept over my parent's last night. Got up, raced to clean the kitchen as fast as I could while my coffee was brewing. The coffee won this time. 

I recorded a Reel while getting ready. Went to the place where we were going to meet my fam a bit early so Josh and I could get in a walk. Then we got coffee, went to a huge antique store (sadly left with nothing but took pictures of my faves so I can remember to come back) and went to lunch with the kids and my parents. Love easy-going and fun days like these 🖤
Back in the day,I was talking with someone about m Back in the day,I was talking with someone about marriage.Josh and I had been married for a few years at that point but this guy was still single. ..

He told me he was studying to get his masters in counseling and he wanted to be a marriage counselor one day.I thought "Hey that's pretty cool" but, curious,because,you know, he was single. 

Anyway, after we'd been talking a few minutes about our interest in helping married couples, he leaned in and said, "You know, I have this theory on marriage.." "Oh yeah?" I said (pretty curious to hear what theories this guy had for all of marriage for everyone everywhere). 

He said, "I believe that every single problem in marriage boils down to communication."

At the time, I didn't really know what to say. I'm more of a *reflector* and then I come up with what I wish I had said later.

Here's what I wish I had said: "Um. Yeah I don't think so. I mean sure, communication helps with a lot of issues. But what about selfishness,⠀addiction,⠀past hurt and trauma, etc? Communication will help people work through those issues but they're connected to much deeper issues that concern the heart--not just your communication skills."

We are all broken, very human, beings and when left to our own devices,⠀we don't have all the tools necessary to "fix" ourselves or our spouse's problems. We can talk until we're blue in the face but we just can't fix ourselves. 

What we do need, is to lean on the Creator who made all things good and makes all things new. To understand that we are not the main characters here. The whole world and everything in it points to Christ and His redeeming power. And yes, he often works that out through us and often through communication. But it's not communication that saves marriages. It's Jesus.

I was just thinking about that today and wanted to get it off my chest. What role do you think communication plays?
Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁 Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁
So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 Love my littlest niece, Eva ❤️
Let's hash something out together: what's somethin Let's hash something out together: what's something you do or used to fight about in your marriage/relationship regularly?

Do you feel like the issue is/was pretty cut and dry? 

Or was there an underlying issue that bubbled up in different ways?

Curious to know your thoughts. 

When Josh and I were first married, we fought a lot. We were pretty low-income, didn't have great jobs, and had a wee baby. While our fights were often about the grocery list, the real issue was that we were SCARED. 

Scared of the adult life we had just stepped into. It was kind of like jumping into a puddle you don't think is that deep until after it's too late and now your socks are completely drowning 🚣🏼‍♀️ 

Luckily, though, they dry off over time, don't they?

After lots of learning and working really hard (both at our jobs and relationship) things started to ease up. We started to see that there was a light at the end of the tunnel and even though we weren't there yet, it gave up hope to carry on together ❤️
Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. O Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. Or if you can't leave the house, sit in the kitchen with a glass of wine. Make time to talk. And make it easier by doing things together. It's so so important ❤️
Top knots over crop tops 😜 Top knots over crop tops 😜
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Feminism, Health, Life & Finances, Motherhood, Sponsored, Work · June 18, 2018

How to Thrive as a Working Mom

I’ve been a working mom, stay at home mom, and a work from home mom. In each and every case, we all have our good days and our bad days. But in the post, I want to help you to have a few more good days than bad days this week. Days where, after you put the kids to bed, you feel like you did get enough done and you really can just take the evening to relax. Currently, I have a full-time remote job working for a NYC based tech startup. On the side, I also blog and I just started writing my first book. Oh, and did I mention I have two kids? Trust me, I’ll be the first person to look at my schedule and call me crazy, but that’s the stage of life we’re in now, and although it’s most-likely temporary, I still want to be my best all the way through it. That said, here’s how I do my best to thrive as a work from home mom:

 

 

Get up before the kids

Picture this: A morning where you roll out of bed when your alarm goes off. You get yourself a cup of coffee and proceed to make your way through your morning routine. Once you’re done getting yourself ready, then either you wake up the kids or they get up when you expect them to.

Now, picture this: You might have gotten 30 more minutes of sleep, but the kids come to your bed and wake you up by touching your face or whisper-yelling that they’re hungry. You multitask by making your coffee while their toast is cooking but forget about it while you’re spreading the peanut butter and pouring the orange juice and by the time you remember it needs to be reheated. It’s almost time for you to start work but you haven’t put on a lick of makeup so you’re forced to slap on what you can with one hand because the baby is feeling clingy this morning.

Now. Which sounds better to you? The multitasking morning or the morning where you get your time and the kids get theirs? I thought so.

I know it means getting up earlier than you have to, but I think a smoother start to the day might be worth it, don’t you?

Lists, lists, and more lists

I have a list for everything- a separate list for every area of my life. A grocery list, blog post idea list, “work stuff” list, to-do list, and things to buy online list.

If I lie down to go to bed and I begin to feel stressed thinking of all the things I need to remember to do the next day, I start to make a list of all the things that need to happen that day, or even that week and I’ll organize it by day. This way, I no longer feel stressed about having to remember everything because I know it’ll be right there on my list in the morning when I wake up.

Do something that makes you proud of you every day

 

Sometimes if we have a goal or dream for our lives that we never end of working towards, it can make us resent our work and/or simply just make us feel bad that we’re not where we want to be. I’ll use fitness as an example but it can be many different things. If I have a day where I work hard at my job, but I don’t workout or eat healthy, I’ll feel down that I’m not meeting my goal of being healthy. However, if I do make the time to even do a short home workout and choose to not break out the cookies, I’ll end up feeling proud of myself and feel more motivated and happy when it comes to my job.

Another example could just be taking the time to take care of myself. Since most of my work is done from a computer, there’s really no need to get dressed, do my hair or makeup, or really brush my teeth for that matter (just kidding, always brush your teeth). But when I don’t do any of those things, my mentality when “going” to work is much different when I’m in my pajamas than when I’m fully dressed and ready for the day.

Of course, being ready for the day will look different for everyone, but whatever makes you feel “put together” do that on days when you know you need to be your best at work.

Collaborate with your husband or support system

I get it. It comes naturally to a mom to feel like she needs to take care of everything herself and asking for help is usually more of an afterthought. Don’t let it be. Part of being successful in any job is learning how to delegate and choose which tasks need to be done by you and which ones can be done by someone else. Be sure to speak openly and often to your husband or those in your support system of busy days or upcoming projects where you may need extra help. You don’t have to do it alone!

Don’t let the little things slow you down

You know what makes women push through the flu better than men? It’s because we don’t have the time for it. The same goes for any other little mishap or wrench in your plans, especially your period. You know, that little monthly wrench in your plans. That’s why I trust Always® Radiant from Walmart to always have the exact pad I need, when I need it. The size selector tool helps me choose what pad I should get based on what I need, when! Find your unique Always® Radiant at Walmart and don’t let the little things get between you and thrive status!

 

This is a sponsored post for SheSpeaks.

In: Feminism, Health, Life & Finances, Motherhood, Sponsored, Work · Tagged: always, better, feel, income, independant, mom, noads, pad, period, sahm, sponsored, stress, strong, support, thrive, wahm, wfhm, woman, Work, working

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#ad It doesn’t always come naturally to ask for help, but stressful feelings can sometimes come from the idea that if we don’t do it ourselves, then it won’t get done (/right). Sometimes being able to open up to the idea that things can happen in ways other than we originally imagined (ie. spending family time over a home-cooked meal that took time that you didn’t have to make vs. spending family time over a meal that was brought to your home), can be really freeing. When Josh and I are feeling overwhelmed with our to-do list for the day, we start to look for things we can cut out in order to make it easier and have a better day overall. @bitesquad gives us a chance to delegate our meals to someone else while we worry about spending more time with the kids, or finishing up work projects for the day. I love knowing that even time escapes me, I still have great options like @bitesquad right at my fingertips. Why not give it a try this week and let me know what you thought! How did your day go knowing that dinner plans weren’t on you?? Download the app and use code MILITARY10 to get $10 off first order of $25 or more & remember to click the box for free delivery for one month!3 Things to Delegate When You’re Feeling Overwhelmed
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Comments

  1. Ashley says

    June 29, 2018 at 7:32 pm

    Soooo many great tips here! And hello gorgeous pictures too mama!

    Reply
  2. Nicole says

    June 29, 2018 at 11:19 pm

    Your intro totally sounded like i wrote it. I’ve been all of those things as well and it’s made for one busy mom of two. I love the tips you have here, especially lists, they are a must. the one I really need to work to incorporate is getting up before the kids. that one is so hard to master when you feel like you never get enough sleep. You’ve inspired me to give it a go once more though…thank you for that!

    Reply

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Why We Promised to Never Bring Up Divorce

Hi! I'm Chelsea and we're the Damon's. We spent the last two years in WA state paying off student loans and just bought our first house in SC! I love a smooth black coffee, Josh's first love is the Seattle Sounders. Our kids are huge dorks and constantly make us laugh and we all love spending as much time outside as possible.

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Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over here and I think it might be working 😉 Today the kids had TWOsday at school and they were so sweet. David wore a tie (I don't exactly get how it tirles in to Twosday but the kids were happy so..) and Evy "twinned" with a couple of sweet friends in her class. It's so sweet when you see your own kids building their own friendships. It just loosens a little piece of anxiety I've had about parenthood since David was still in my tummy. How did you spend your TWOsday??

Sandals @naotfootwear 💕
Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Jos Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Josh in a quiet house - the kids slept over my parent's last night. Got up, raced to clean the kitchen as fast as I could while my coffee was brewing. The coffee won this time. 

I recorded a Reel while getting ready. Went to the place where we were going to meet my fam a bit early so Josh and I could get in a walk. Then we got coffee, went to a huge antique store (sadly left with nothing but took pictures of my faves so I can remember to come back) and went to lunch with the kids and my parents. Love easy-going and fun days like these 🖤
Back in the day,I was talking with someone about m Back in the day,I was talking with someone about marriage.Josh and I had been married for a few years at that point but this guy was still single. ..

He told me he was studying to get his masters in counseling and he wanted to be a marriage counselor one day.I thought "Hey that's pretty cool" but, curious,because,you know, he was single. 

Anyway, after we'd been talking a few minutes about our interest in helping married couples, he leaned in and said, "You know, I have this theory on marriage.." "Oh yeah?" I said (pretty curious to hear what theories this guy had for all of marriage for everyone everywhere). 

He said, "I believe that every single problem in marriage boils down to communication."

At the time, I didn't really know what to say. I'm more of a *reflector* and then I come up with what I wish I had said later.

Here's what I wish I had said: "Um. Yeah I don't think so. I mean sure, communication helps with a lot of issues. But what about selfishness,⠀addiction,⠀past hurt and trauma, etc? Communication will help people work through those issues but they're connected to much deeper issues that concern the heart--not just your communication skills."

We are all broken, very human, beings and when left to our own devices,⠀we don't have all the tools necessary to "fix" ourselves or our spouse's problems. We can talk until we're blue in the face but we just can't fix ourselves. 

What we do need, is to lean on the Creator who made all things good and makes all things new. To understand that we are not the main characters here. The whole world and everything in it points to Christ and His redeeming power. And yes, he often works that out through us and often through communication. But it's not communication that saves marriages. It's Jesus.

I was just thinking about that today and wanted to get it off my chest. What role do you think communication plays?

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Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growin Being a mom has always meant so much to me. Growing up, I thought it was pretty much all I was cut out to do, which ended up being false. But even though I've learned that I'm capable of so many other things, being a mom is still one of my highest aspirations. As we're getting our home ready for fostering, I can't help but think of how the little one(s) entering our home will feel but also how David and Evy will feel. How will they react if we parent slightly differently? Will they understand that we're working to build trust and connection or will they feel indignant? These are the things I pray about and also speak to the kids about in the days leading up. We're all excited but I have the feeling of heaviness that we don't and won't understand the burden until we're all already carrying it together.
Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over Doing my gosh darned best to manifest spring over here and I think it might be working 😉 Today the kids had TWOsday at school and they were so sweet. David wore a tie (I don't exactly get how it tirles in to Twosday but the kids were happy so..) and Evy "twinned" with a couple of sweet friends in her class. It's so sweet when you see your own kids building their own friendships. It just loosens a little piece of anxiety I've had about parenthood since David was still in my tummy. How did you spend your TWOsday??

Sandals @naotfootwear 💕
Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Jos Today was a sweet day. Woke up at 8:30 next to Josh in a quiet house - the kids slept over my parent's last night. Got up, raced to clean the kitchen as fast as I could while my coffee was brewing. The coffee won this time. 

I recorded a Reel while getting ready. Went to the place where we were going to meet my fam a bit early so Josh and I could get in a walk. Then we got coffee, went to a huge antique store (sadly left with nothing but took pictures of my faves so I can remember to come back) and went to lunch with the kids and my parents. Love easy-going and fun days like these 🖤
Back in the day,I was talking with someone about m Back in the day,I was talking with someone about marriage.Josh and I had been married for a few years at that point but this guy was still single. ..

He told me he was studying to get his masters in counseling and he wanted to be a marriage counselor one day.I thought "Hey that's pretty cool" but, curious,because,you know, he was single. 

Anyway, after we'd been talking a few minutes about our interest in helping married couples, he leaned in and said, "You know, I have this theory on marriage.." "Oh yeah?" I said (pretty curious to hear what theories this guy had for all of marriage for everyone everywhere). 

He said, "I believe that every single problem in marriage boils down to communication."

At the time, I didn't really know what to say. I'm more of a *reflector* and then I come up with what I wish I had said later.

Here's what I wish I had said: "Um. Yeah I don't think so. I mean sure, communication helps with a lot of issues. But what about selfishness,⠀addiction,⠀past hurt and trauma, etc? Communication will help people work through those issues but they're connected to much deeper issues that concern the heart--not just your communication skills."

We are all broken, very human, beings and when left to our own devices,⠀we don't have all the tools necessary to "fix" ourselves or our spouse's problems. We can talk until we're blue in the face but we just can't fix ourselves. 

What we do need, is to lean on the Creator who made all things good and makes all things new. To understand that we are not the main characters here. The whole world and everything in it points to Christ and His redeeming power. And yes, he often works that out through us and often through communication. But it's not communication that saves marriages. It's Jesus.

I was just thinking about that today and wanted to get it off my chest. What role do you think communication plays?
Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁 Merry Christmas from the Damons! 🎁
So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 So much joy in one photo! Ok, maybe 4 photos 😜 Love my littlest niece, Eva ❤️
Let's hash something out together: what's somethin Let's hash something out together: what's something you do or used to fight about in your marriage/relationship regularly?

Do you feel like the issue is/was pretty cut and dry? 

Or was there an underlying issue that bubbled up in different ways?

Curious to know your thoughts. 

When Josh and I were first married, we fought a lot. We were pretty low-income, didn't have great jobs, and had a wee baby. While our fights were often about the grocery list, the real issue was that we were SCARED. 

Scared of the adult life we had just stepped into. It was kind of like jumping into a puddle you don't think is that deep until after it's too late and now your socks are completely drowning 🚣🏼‍♀️ 

Luckily, though, they dry off over time, don't they?

After lots of learning and working really hard (both at our jobs and relationship) things started to ease up. We started to see that there was a light at the end of the tunnel and even though we weren't there yet, it gave up hope to carry on together ❤️
Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. O Go on a walk with your spouse before Netflixing. Or if you can't leave the house, sit in the kitchen with a glass of wine. Make time to talk. And make it easier by doing things together. It's so so important ❤️
Top knots over crop tops 😜 Top knots over crop tops 😜
Josh and I have been doing a lot of reading on par Josh and I have been doing a lot of reading on parenting recently and I love so many of the lessons we've been learning on creating structure while also being empathetic to your child's needs. 

One of the concepts that's stuck with me is how we should "sandwich" our criticism or corrections with positive things. Kids can get discouraged pretty easily but we can help make sure they feel reassured and loved by complimenting them and noticing & verbalizing their growth as well. 

So for example, saying, "I'm very proud of you for putting away your toys. I want you to work on not bossing around your sister - I'll be the parent in charge. Ok? But the way you put your clothes in your drawers was great!"

Idk about you but I would love if other adults sandwiched their criticism too 😂

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