Do you ever feel insecure? Ha! That’s probably a silly question. We all get insecure. And if you say you don’t, you’re lying behind a wall of falsehoods! The truth is, we all have our moments. Some of them lasting longer than others. Keep reading if you want to learn how to get a fresh start and walk confidently through your day feeling comfortable in your own skin- no matter what!
Understand your own personality
I’ve said this in past blog posts but it’s so worth saying again. I used to have huge insecurity issues and there were a lot of factors that helped lead me out of that and feeling comfortable and confident in myself. Things like a supportive husband, putting myself in places that were outside my comfort zone, and understanding that God created me uniquely and any weaknesses I had were supplemented by Him. Besides this, taking a personality test (ok ok, a lot of personality tests because I think they’re so fun) really helped me to understand myself and why I am the way that I am. Reading about my personality helped me to clearly define what I was good at and helped me feel more comfortable with the fact that I wasn’t good at everything. Instead of being jealous of others for their strengths, I decided to develop my own natural strengths and see the ways that I could work well with others, complimenting them rather than in competition with them.
Eat foods that make you feel good
It may sound like a surprise given the amount of time I spend talking about going to the gym and avoiding sugar, but there was a time in my life where I really “let myself go.” It was during and after my pregnancy with David. I know, I know. You’re supposed to gain weight during pregnancy. Of course! But the weight I gained was a quite a bit more than necessary and it wasn’t because I was eating too many kale salads. Let’s just say Taco Bell’s sales went up that year. I was constantly hungry, had absolutely no self-control, and instead of making the effort to keep our house stocked with healthy foods, I would just grab whatever was easiest. Obviously the foods I was eating tasted pretty good. I wouldn’t have gained 10 lbs in my first trimester if they didn’t! But they weren’t making me feel good. The problem is, I had never really made health a priority in my life before then, so I couldn’t really tell the difference. After David was born and I finally decided to get my act together with what foods I decided to put in my body, I could totally tell the difference! If I ate “clean” for even just one day, I felt great. I felt healthy, energized, and physically more comfortable. Then, if I had a day where we were on the road and we ate a lot of processed food, fast food, or sugars, I felt it immediately. I felt… yucky. I would feel bloated, slower, uncomfortable, I would get headaches, etc. It was like night and day! So much so that I almost completely lost the desire to eat processed or sugary foods because I knew that I would feel horrible afterward. I truly believe it affected me mentally as well.
Wear clothes that fit your body now
A while after David was born, I remember thinking that I was in a really prolonged awkward stage where none of my maternity clothes fit, but none of pre-pregnancy clothes fit either. Being raised in an extremely frugal household, I wasn’t about to buy a whole new wardrobe, especially when I wanted to lose the weight anyway. So I wore clothes that didn’t fit. And I was pretty self-conscious about it for a while until I finally decided to get my butt to the gym, eat healthy, and lost the excess weight I had gained. If I could do it again, I would have bought or thrifted clothes that fit my body at that point in time rather than wearing clothes that were too big or too small. *Let me just say as a disclaimer that I do not believe women should pressure themselves to “bounce back” to their pre-pregnancy body after giving birth. I think the reason why I felt self-conscious is because I knew that I wasn’t being healthy with my eating habits and I felt guilty about that, but not enough to make a change for several months. Once I was finally fed up with not being responsible for my own health, I made a change. Since then I’ve made it part of my lifestyle to avoid certain foods and make fitness a priority and I’ve felt comfortable in my clothes. Not only that, but being healthy and making fitness a priority has given me a sense of confidence that I never knew before I started. Knowing that I’m doing my best to take care of my body helps me to feel confident in my own skin consistently, despite my circumstances.
Do something kind for someone else
Ok, I’m just going to say it. I often see something in common among those who tend feel very insecure about themselves. You want to know what that is? The fact that they’re often thinking about themselves. For those who may have a tendency to be easily offended, hear me out. I’m not saying you’re a bad person. I know a lot of very kind people who often feel insecure because they are constantly thinking about how they appear to other people. They’re almost always worried about their appearance, the words they say, if they’re acceptable to other people, and if people look up to them or down at them. In all this insecure thinking, they’re focusing way way too much on themselves. My point here is that it’s hard to feel insecure when you forget about yourself. How does one do that you ask? Simply turn your thoughts outward. Try to focus on other people’s needs; you know, how you can help them, encourage them, make their day, etc. It sounds ironic that we can help solve insecurity by worrying about other people
I think that sometimes we compare ourselves to other people and we think that we don’t measure up because of the mistakes that we’ve made. But let me tell you something- we’ve all made mistakes. We’ve all done things that we don’t really like to think about or that may embarrass us. We may think that the mistakes we’ve made in the past make us less worthy than other people of… whatever it may be: respect, love, forgiveness, etc. Whatever it is, there comes a time when it needs to be a part of your past and a learning experience, even possibly one that you can be proud of sharing because of what you’ve learned or how far you’ve come since then. Past mistakes aren’t going anywhere, so it’s up to us to choose how we remember them: as a turning point and lesson learned, or something to be embarrassed about.
I think this ties in well with point #1, but there’s more too it. Maybe you’re not worried about your personality differences at all, but your situation in life. It could be where you live, your education or job, your marriage, the things you’re able to afford- whatever. You may feel stuck in a situation where your life like you’re just not “there yet.” I want to encourage you to find contentment and live in the moment. Instead of looking at what you have, look at what you can give. “He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have.” -Socrates
Take a shower
I’m not sure how many points are on the overall Mood Scale, but I think my mood jumps up about 50 points after I take a shower. I feel clean, fresh, exfoliated, and I think it gives me a symbolic punch on the reset button. My suggestion to you is, take a shower when you can enjoy it. Sure, you might want to save the evening for a Netflix binge or, well, sleeping. But if after bedtime is the only time you can take a show uninterrupted and for however long you want, then do it. Taking a shower doesn’t just have to be something to check off on your to-do list. Make it a mini getaway with Olay Moisture Ribbons Plus Shea Butter + Manuka Honey Body Wash or Lavender. Grab yourself a fluffy loofa or exfoliating glove and lather away the stress and dry skin that can pile up during the winter months. The rich moisturizing formula in Olay Moisture Ribbons Plus helps you overcome the harsh effects of winter. I know that where we live in the PNW, winters can get so cold and be really harsh on my skin, which is why I take extra care during the winter to keep my skin moisturized 24/7. Step out of the shower feeling refreshed and in your best skin by using Olay Moisture Ribbons Plus body wash. Join the #WinterSkinChallenge and share how Olay and is changing your skin for the better this winter!
This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Olay. The opinions and text are all mine.
robin rue says
I’ve been in a major slump this year and it’s time to get out of it. I need to start eating better and working out!
Laura @ MommyDearest says
This is a fantastic list. i AGREE WITH WEARING CLOTHES THAT FIT NOW. FOR YEARS I WAS TOO FRUGAL TO BUY CLOTHES THAT FIT AND I DIDN’T FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF. I ALSO AGREE WITH FORGIVING YOURSELF AND DOING SOMETHING KIND FOR SOMEONE ELSE. THIS IS A GREAT LIST.
Melissa Chapman says
Great thoughts I see the underlying theme is to be happy with yourself and what you have now. That is important and treating yourself is always good advice.
Krystal Butherus says
It’s easy to get down on some of our favorite clothes not fitting. Whenever I’m out, I always make an effort to smile at someone, or just a simple conversation. You never know what kind of day they’re having, and your kind words can make an impact!
Angela Tolsma says
Wearing clothes that fit can make a huge difference in confidence. But along with that is forgiveness. It’s important to be okay with your body as it is and forgive yourself of cruel words
Love the comments on the clothing! I think we all have a closet with clothes that don’t fit are ill fitting or just feel icky in. I chose to cull mine last january and have been so much happier!
Cindy Ingalls says
We can be so hard on ourselves, when we really should take more care to be kind. Even being good to others can help lift your mood and make you feel better. This year has been a hard one but I’ve still found ways to do something nice for myself.
AnnMarie John says
These are awesome ways to make yourself feel better and let go of the stress as well! It’s never healthy to compare yourself to others and it’s definitely something that people shouldn’t do.
Terri Steffes says
really great tips. I have to remember that i need to just be myself, whomever that is at the moment.
This is such an important topic. We really do need to take the time to feel good about ourselves…si important for our health. I like how you mention to wear clothes that fit your body. It’s not always possible to buy a whole new WARDROBE, but you can definitely splurge to get some essentials.
I love these tips so much. I couldn’t agree more with better eating. it really makes a difference!
I love This so much. Its so important to onow your own personality and know who You are.